A Hard Business

Forgiveness is tricky business.  It is hard business.  We are all for it when it is someone asking us for it.  When the shoe is on the other foot, it is easier to play the blame game than to be the one seeking to restore a broken relationship.  I have in my memory of ministry a moment filled with brokenness, words spoken which should have been held, and an unwillingness to budge an inch toward finding middle ground.  The only reason the church did not ask me to leave was because I asked to be moved.   

When I think of those days, it is with much regret.  I completely ignored what Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount when He told His disciples, "...when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift...and first be reconciled."  (Matthew 5:23-24).  I left that place spurning an attempt at reconciliation and carried with me a heart full of anger.  I consoled myself by saying it was not my fault.   

Jesus makes it clear that who is at fault is never the issue.  The issue is the broken relationship.  If we realize there is a broken relationship in our life and we choose to ignore it, or move it from the scope of our responsibility, we are simply ignoring the Word and the will of Jesus.  In this verse it is clear that the issue is never finding who is at fault, but making things right.  Whatever it takes to make a relationship right again is what we are called to do.  It has nothing to do with placing blame.