What I Don't Know

When I was younger, way younger, I knew a lot more than I do now.  Everything about matters of personal belief, my understanding of God, and the way we should live as a Christian was very clear back then.  Things were black and white.  Ironclad.  Wiggle room was not something to be tolerated.  My world was filled more with answers than questions.  I must have been wearing the robe of the Pharisee underneath that black ministerial robe I put on most every Sunday.

 

Somewhere along the way to now, not exactly sure when, I lost some of the certainty about things concerning God.  I started seeing more gray in my life.  I began to understand that everything was not nailed down quite as tightly as those desk were in the novel, "The Hotel New Hampshire."  I come to an awareness that there is more grace in the hands of God than ever I had even considered.  God was not out to get me, but to deliver me from myself.  None of this means there are not things that I consider to be theological bedrock.  Some things are still poured in concrete.  But, even as grace abounds over sin, so does grace abound over the "shoulds" of life.

One of the things a greater awareness of grace does is to give me the freedom not to know as much.  You know how it is.  Grace enables us to live without having to have all the answers for ourselves and others.  Becoming comfortable with "I don't know" is an option.   The more grace we see in our world, the more we become able to leave things in the hands of God which is where things belong in the first place.  Maybe you agree with me.  Not having to have it all figured out is such a great relief.