"Lord, this Psalm makes me remember some conflicts and battles within Your church. Remembering brings a sense of shame. Regret. I always saw myself as knowing the right way forward and figured myself on Your side. Those who opposed me and my way forward were on another side. Lord, I'm ashamed to confess this to You after all these years. Maybe some of those struggles were important enough to take a stand, but I fear many of them were about lesser things, trivial things, things that were insignificant in terms of Your Kingdom moving forward.
The Psalmist obviously had those in his life who stood against him, who meant to do him harm. He had every reason to fight against them. They plotted against him. They stirred the pot of strife and conflict. (Psalm 59:3) They called out aloud for all to hear their sharp words which came from a spirit never satisfied. (Psalm 59:7, 14) Yet, instead of launching his own attack against these adversaries, he put them in Your keeping. Instead of engaging adversaries, he turned them over to You, trusting You to handle them.
What brings about shame are memories of being so focused on my anger that all I did was spend my time plotting against them. It became a consuming thing that drowned all my energy, my time, and my life. The Psalmist speaks of another way. The way I forgot was the way of trusting You to bring about the right I only perceived myself to know. In my trouble I should have been focused more on You and less on them--even less on me. Forgive me, Lord. In Your mercy, Lord, forgive me. Amen."
The Psalmist obviously had those in his life who stood against him, who meant to do him harm. He had every reason to fight against them. They plotted against him. They stirred the pot of strife and conflict. (Psalm 59:3) They called out aloud for all to hear their sharp words which came from a spirit never satisfied. (Psalm 59:7, 14) Yet, instead of launching his own attack against these adversaries, he put them in Your keeping. Instead of engaging adversaries, he turned them over to You, trusting You to handle them.
What brings about shame are memories of being so focused on my anger that all I did was spend my time plotting against them. It became a consuming thing that drowned all my energy, my time, and my life. The Psalmist speaks of another way. The way I forgot was the way of trusting You to bring about the right I only perceived myself to know. In my trouble I should have been focused more on You and less on them--even less on me. Forgive me, Lord. In Your mercy, Lord, forgive me. Amen."
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