One More Word

Some might wonder about the need for a prayer room ministry if people across the church are serious about the discipline of praying.   Of course, it goes without saying that nothing really takes the place of people praying for and within the church; yet, it can also be said that an effective prayer room can become a source of spiritual power for the church, a place which provides a visible reminder of the importance of prayer, and a tool for educating and promoting effective and widespread intercessory prayer within the church.   

Any prayer room ministry is likely to start small.  There is nothing wrong with a slow and small beginning.  Jesus underscored the way the Kingdom of God works as He used the mustard seed image.  Small beginnings are not only acceptable, but speak of the way of the Kingdom.  Beginning not only gets something started, but it also enables the unfolding of possibilities.  What begins with a couple of people for a limited amount of time can become that seed of faith which will grow a ministry that has widespread and even worldwide influence.  

One thing to consider is the presence of such a room and what it communicates to the whole church.  Even as the sanctuary declares the importance of worship so does a prayer room speak to the importance of prayer.  Its presence in a visible  and prominent place and the going and coming of people speaks loudly that praying is important here.  Its presence and ministry is a reminder to everyone that if there are prayer needs in their lives, there are people who are committed to pray.  While printing a list of prayer concerns in a bulletin is a reminder that folks have not been forgotten, the presence of a prayer room reminds people that someone is praying for them.

Final Thoughts

While some will suggest using an out of the way room to create a prayer room, it might also be so out of the way it ends us not being used.  Out of the way rooms might be quieter and less likely to be invaded by disturbing noises, but being in a high visibility area is a way of reminding people of the importance of this particular ministry.  It is better for those who pass by to wonder, "What's going on in that room?" than it is for folks to never know anyone is at the work of prayer.  There was a guy in one of my churches who used the steps leading up to the pulpit as a place of prayer during morning worship.  I learned he was praying there one morning when I stumbled over him on my way to make a quick trip during a hymn to get some water.    

While he might have taken the idea of praying in a high traffic area to an extreme, it is better to be known about than forgotten.  A prayer room near the sanctuary could be used as a place to gather to pray for the preacher before the beginning of worship.  A high visibility area near the church office might be used by more people during the week as it would feel safer than being at the back of the building.  The more visible it is, the more likely people will know about it and, perhaps, become volunteers to staff the prayer room.  

Getting volunteers is one of the things which will determine how much time the prayer room is used.  Some churches are able to schedule volunteers during the hours the office is open and some after addressing security issues even have figured out ways to have a continuous presence.  While it may be best to start out small and slow, it is always going to be true that the presence of the prayer room and its ministry will grow as people gather to pray for their church as well as the needs of the community and the world.

Prayer in the Church

In the years before I retired, I invited Terry Teykl to come to the church I was serving to lead a Prayer Conference.  In 1987 he sensed God calling him to lead the church in growing its prayer ministries which involved creating room for prayer.  Even now I remember the fervor and power of the Spirit that he brought to our congregation.  One of the things I learned as I sought to make prayer a priority in the life of the churches for which I was responsible was that it was easy to create a prayer room but it was another matter to enable it to be a place from which prayer originated.    

For those seeking such a ministry, know that there will be much enthusiasm in the process of planning, organizing the room, and getting it ready for use, but its use will be determined not by the enthusiasm of a beginning.  It will be a powerful place of prayer only if there are a core of people who believe strongly in such a ministry existing within the church.  It may seem strange to say that such a core is necessary when it would seem that everyone would be an advocate for praying, but a prayer room ministry requires people who are committed to pray by getting on their knees.  

The church does many things well, but for some reason, praying seems to be one of its more difficult tasks and one that often never gets beyond just listing some prayer concerns in the Sunday bulletin.  Unfortunately, praying does not excite the masses within the church.  What is likely to be true is that a strong prayer ministry will happen after some discouragement, a lot of perseverance, and enough praying to infuse it with the power of the Holy Spirit.

The Power Room

Churches have space dedicated for all kinds of ministries.  There is a space for worship and another for fellowship meals. It goes without saying that there will be something close to a commercial kitchen for the preparation of meals.  There are offices for the administrative work.  Of course, there is a large room for the youth of the church.  Some churches have parlors and libraries and even showers.  A conference room is always nice and not to be forgotten is a music area large enough for a choir and any necessary musical instruments.   

One room often overlooked is a prayer room.  This is not to say that some churches do not have prayer rooms and that they are used, but unfortunately, such is the exception.  It is also true that when such a room is provided it often looks more like a closet and ends us accumulating stuff that has nothing to do with praying.  The church seems to gets excited about many ministries, but its prayer ministry seems more like an elective rather than the core curriculum of discipleship.   

It is impossible to see Peter preaching on Pentecost without first seeing the church on its knees in prayer.   Imagine a church off the grid.  Off the grid means no electricity.  If imagining a church off the grid is far fetched, imagine a church when the electrical power shuts down.  If it is Sunday morning, worship is canceled.  Without the power, the church comes to standstill.  A clergy friend recently wrote, "The prayer room is the power source...the lack of emphasis on and the practice of prayer is the reason for the church's spiritual impotency."  Enough said.

A Moment of Exploration

Some time ago I found myself on an other than Sunday day wandering around inside a mostly deserted church.  At the end of the time of wandering, I felt like some kind of modern day ecclesiastical explorer.  During my hours of exploration I found the library with its shelves full of books and dust.  I visited a few Sunday School classrooms that looked more like college lecture halls than space where people sat around together talking about some of the tough questions of faith.  A clergy friend one told me that churches  talk if we are willing to listen and that I should be especially attentive the first time I walked into what would be a new appointment.  His words have proven to be true many times. 

After an hour or so I wandered into a room far away from any aisles of pedestrian traffic.  It was a room  that told me to look around which I did.  As I obeyed the inner voice I was hearing,  I saw the tables stored behind the open door, a few open Bibles, and what looked like an altar.  "This looks like a prayer room," was what I remember thinking and as I looked toward the door again, I saw the bronze plaque which read, "Prayer Room."  It looked like it had been awhile since anyone had prayed in that cluttered space.  I wondered how it came to be forgotten.  I wondered, too, if it could be brought to life again.  My guess was that it had not only been forgotten, but had disappeared from the mind and heart of the church that gave it space.    

I remember pulling in a chair and sitting there for a spell.  As I sat there praying, I remembered some rooms like the one in which I was praying that had been set aside in the days of my ministry and I wondered if they had suffered the same fate in the years following their birth.  I knew it was likely.  Sadly, one of the hardest rooms and ministries to maintain is one which covers the church in prayer.  It may also be one of the reasons the church is struggling to survive rather than being a place filled with "signs and wonders."  (Acts 2:43)

Arguing With God

I have never had much success arguing with God.  Of course, I should know better.  I have read the story of Moses many, many times and it always ends the same.  Job had a rather lengthy argument with God before he finally got put in his place.  Some have argued with God by just trying to disappear like Elijah did with his attempt at spelunking.  Jeremiah tried playing the "I am only a boy" card (Jeremiah 1:6) and then later complained that he had become a laughingstock (Jeremiah 20:7), but God would not lift the call to speak.  Maybe Joseph's hesitation to be a part of what God was doing with Mary was somewhat less than a spat, but it surely was not something which excited him.  He was looking for the exit when he had his dream.

Most of us have had those moments when we knew God wanted us to do something and we balked with what we perceived to be a thousand good reasons.  The night I heard God calling me to preach began a six month argument with God which ended up with me ending up where I am today.  There have also been those times when I have heard God telling me to seek reconciliation with someone I was not yet ready to forgive.  While I usually saw it God's way, there was one time when I waited too long and death came to the one with whom I had a broken relationship before I got around to doing what I knew God was calling me to do.  

Arguing with God, or ignoring what He is saying, or pretending we do not hear is a more common experience than most of us would choose to admit.  We hear the call to offer forgiveness and we play the "It's his fault" game.  We are asked to give and we argue that our own wallets are too skinny.  We know we are being led to spending more time in our devotional life which would not happen if  God only looked at  our daily planner.   Whatever the argument, remember one thing.  Disagreeing with God does not usually end very well.

A Concern for the Church

I am a Methodist.  I have never known anything else.  The first Sunday School class I attended as a child was in a Methodist Church.  I was baptized at one of its altars and met Jesus in one of its parsonages.  I could say that nearly every significant moment of my life has been in its shadow.  The fact that I am a born and raised ordained Methodist does not keep me from seeing things which raise concerns for its future.  One of the things which is a concern is a baptismal font that is hard to find and one that has no water of expectancy when it is found.  

No matter where we stand in Methodist circles, we are likely to hear that the church is about making disciples. I have no problem with such a focus.  It should be the core mission of any church.  To speak of making disciples would indicate that the Methodist church is an evangelistic church.  With this in mind it has seemed strange to me that apart from one Sunday I have not seen any baptisms in the last two years.  The only time baptismal waters have been stirred is when babies are baptized, or confirmation groups come forward around Easter which is good, but it would appear baptisms that are about professions of faith would be happening with greater frequency in a church that is committed to making disciples.  

I fear too many churches have become comfortable with the status quo.  Preaching seems to be geared more toward teaching discipleship rather than inviting people to become disciples through professing faith in Christ.  There are plenty of churches modeling being the hands and feet of Jesus through acts of service, but the concern for souls does not always appear to be as obvious.  Granted I am an old fashioned, traditional, and conservative Methodist preacher and my observations may not hold water for some, but it remains something which gives me concern for the future of a church that has a spiritual heritage of calling people to become disciples of Jesus Christ.  A church serious about making disciples cannot be content with treading water through biological growth.  

All About Grace

Tomorrow afternoon I will be returning to the Zoar Church, the first church to which I was appointed, to lead a memorial service for a friend of over 50 years.  Our friendship found its roots when I was his pastor.  Over the years we have fished together, shared meals, had conversations about faith for which the both of us could not find answers, visited in each other's home, and found in each other a place for vulnerability.  Before Warren died, he wrote down some instructions for his funeral.  On the phone his daughter shared a note for me.  "Tell Bill," he said, "not to preach me in....or out!"  He, of course, was talking about heaven. 

I am as convinced as was the Apostle Paul about the impossibility of being separated from the love of God that my friend is today in the heavenly place that Jesus promised to prepare for him.  It is not a matter of my being able to preach him into heaven, or him doing enough good things to earn his way into the heavenly place.  He has arrived safely Home as anyone of us arrives at our eternal Home.  It is not about our deeds, or the amount of money given, or about the recommendation of some influential soul who already has the ear of Jesus in heaven, but about grace.  The old gospel song we love to sing has it right when it sends our voices heavenward singing, "...'tis grace hath brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home."   

Our debt is always to grace.  The grace of God is a gift.  The assurance of the salvation we know, the forgiveness for ours sins, the unconditional love of God, and the resurrected life pioneered by Jesus and given to us is ours to know not because we deserve it, or have earned it, but because God in His kind mercy has chosen to grant it to us as a gift.  We sing the song about amazing and marvelous grace not because of the tune, but because we have come to know it as life giving truth in our own lives.

Discernment

Discerning the leading of God is not easy.  If it was easy, we might use a different word than discern.  The reality is that knowing God's way is not always as easy as a casual glance in His direction, or as simple as asking someone on the corner of a street in a small town for directions.  The word "discern" points toward something that might not be obvious, or visible to the eyes of birth.  It is a word which directs us toward an impending and inevitable struggle.  

Most likely what we seek is not going to be known tomorrow since it is hidden still in the hands of God and exists in that invisible realm of not yet revealed.  It is also often difficult to know because of our impatience with God.  The first temptation faced in discerning what God wants us to do is to lay aside what we perceive it to be through our logic.  We tend to jump ahead of God and end up landing on our own assumptions and desires.  Another hurdle to face is the way we can end up trying to manipulate God into providing clarity for us when part the process of knowing is living in the unknowing.  

What we often forget is that God is one who is not as concerned with arriving at the destination as He is in the journey that brings us to the moment of arrival.  The discerning process is one of trusting One who leads from a distance, who takes us where we cannot see, and who is not necessarily in a hurry to do so.  Discerning the leading of God is often like peeling layers of thin skin from an onion.  We will finally see and know what is hidden, but only as we wait on the Lord to show us the way.   

The Final Change

Sitting quietly under a canopy of lush green leaves in what is the coolest part of a hot summer days gives the spirit permission to roam into time and space that is apart from here but sure to come.  Rich green looking leaves will one day be brown, crinkled, and dancing to the ground.  It is inevitable.  Life is always changing around us even as invisible subtle changes are taking place within us.  There are many messages the Creation speaks to us on behalf of the Creator . These silent words about change should certainly be words heard by all of us; yet, we so often cling to the what is of the status quo with hands that will finally have to be pried loose.  

None of us are the person we were yesterday.  Yesterday we were conceived and the day after we were born and each day since then we have been on a journey that has taken us to strength and then toward weakness.  It is all a part of the plan of God for the creation of which we are apart.  Is there anything that grows so weak into death that it does not live again?  The tallest of these trees under which I sit on this afternoon will one day become a part of the earth, nurture it, and send forth new life from the ground enriched by its seeds and its nurturing power.  

The ancient man, Job, acknowledged this truth (Job 14:7-9) just before he asked the question, "If a man dies, shall he live again?" (Job 14:14) Centuries later the question Job cast heavenward would be answered with a finality that cannot be denied.  Jesus, the holy One come from heaven to dwell among us said on his way to his own death, "I am the resurrection and the life.  Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live..." (11:25).  Jesus did die as He said and so will all of us.  He also promised life beyond this life and in that final moment of taking off mortality for immortality. (I Corinthians 15:53), He will surely give it.  

Slowing Down

I remember from my high school basketball days a friend and teammate whom we nicknamed "Pondwater" because he moved so slowly on the basketball court.  Over the years I have been accused a time or two of walking too slow.  Usually, the word about my moving about speed came from someone who was in a hurry.  Hurrying is something we all do.  Even though called slow by some, I get in a hurry just like most folks.  Some folks just cannot seem to slow down.  The only thing that has the power to slow them down is old age.   

What is also true is that there is a hurrying no one can observe in us.  It is the hurrying we do even when we are sitting still.  How many times have we sat alone somewhere and yet sensed that our mind was racing ahead to some task waiting to be done?  Slowing down our spirit is for many of us a harder task than slowing down our physical body.  Many times we look like the definition of inertia, but inside in the unseen places, it is pedal to the medal.  Is is it not true that the root of our hurrying is our anxiety about our life?  Is it not also true that the antithesis of anxiety is trust?  Are we hurrying within and without because we are afraid God is not going to be able to take care of the things of our life?  Is it not true that much of our hurried anxiety is the product of a life that suffers from misplaced priorities?  

A tough word for many of us is found in Philippians 4:6:  "Do not worry about anything..." and another equally as hard word comes from the mouth of Jesus as we hear Him saying, "do not worry about your life, what you will eat...drink...wear..."  (Matthew 6:25).  The way of slowing down, alleviating the anxiety, and learning to trust is found in embracing a single action each day, "Be still and and know that I am God."  (Psalm 46:10).  Breathe and ponder that word each day.  It will make a difference. 

The Centrality of the Church

In the earlier pages of "The Seven Storey Mountain,"  Thomas Merton in very descriptive language speaks of a village in France with the church at its physical center.  Merton wrote, "The church had been fixed into the landscape in such a way as to become the keystone...The whole landscape was unified by the church."  In this village of his childhood memory all the streets led to the church and whatever journey was taken into the countryside, the eyes were drawn back to its sacred spiral in the village.  It is a page proclaiming the centrality of the church as well as the drawing power of the Sacramental Christ.   

The world in which we live today is so different.  There are several dozen churches in even the smallest of towns and few there are which really dominate the landscape and capture the eyes.  Yet, is also true that for many of us the church has been and is the central point of our lives.  The church upon which our life centers may not be a single physical structure, but instead an invisible spiritual community which has always existed and will always exist in our heart and spirit.  To it we are always turning.  It is the dwelling of the incarnate sacramental Christ and it continually points us toward Him.  

Our lives are not just transformed by this invisible holy community, they are also both turned toward and directed forward by the Christ whose Spirit dwells in the invisible Kingdom which is always hovering over and filling our lives with an awareness of holy presence. While it is true that there are many around us who only have eyes that see things which are temporal and passing in nature, how blessed we are if we have eyes to see the church as an invisible presence present in whatever place in the world we are divinely placed to stand.

What is Jesus Doing?

Years ago a bracelet question worn by many was, "What Would Jesus Do?" Of course, this is a lot of words for a bracelet so it became shortened to "WWJD."  The bracelet seemed to be worn by just about everyone back in its inaugural days and actually was instrumental in launching a Jesus movement among young people.   What many did not realize at the time was that a novel published in 1896 by Charles Monroe Sheldon known as "In His Steps" had as its full title, "In His Steps: What Would Jesus Do?"  Most people who wore the bracelet have likely put it in a drawer of other memories from the past by now; however, the question still hangs out there in the air in many of our conversations.  

As a way of settling once and for all the religious controversies, social issues, and political arguments some seem ready to put on the bracelets again. Surely, knowing what Jesus would do would be the final word in settling all the things about which folks disagree.  However, it is still not working.  It is much like it was back in those divisive days of civil war in our country when both north and south claimed that what Jesus would do would have Him on our side.   Since this question is not really getting us anywhere maybe it is time to wonder if the wrong question is being asked.  

Maybe the real question is "What is Jesus doing?"  When we start looking for the answer to that question, we do not need to look at church leaders, social activists, or politicians.  Instead, we need only look in the mirror each day.  Whatever Jesus is doing in the midst of the chaotic times in which we live is going to be done through our hands, feet, and heart.  My reading of the gospel always shows Jesus treating people who are friend or foe with love and kindness and respect.  Surely, this is what He would choose to do in our troubled times, but how in the world is He going to do it unless we finally come to that place of laying aside the language of division and surrendering ourselves to the language of love? 

A Simple Definition

It does not take many.  The Word says, "For where two or three are gathered in My name, I am there among them."  (Matthew 18:20). When I consider these words, I am reminded of Abraham pleading with God for the souls of Sodom.  He started out asking God if He would spare the city if fifty faithful were found and finally he came to the question about ten being enough.  (Genesis 18:22-33).  Indeed, what we know is that God does not require a crowd.  He comes even when there is only a few, or even one of us. (Luke 15:1-7). 

Those words of Jesus about the two or the three are, perhaps, the simplest and most primitive definition of the church.   It is not a word which requires much.  The church defined by these words is too big for a structure of brick and mortar.  It has no cross, no candles, no communion table.  There is no ordained order, no division between clergy and laity.  The language of Jesus speaks of a community and the inclusion of Jesus in the community enables us to know that this community is not just any community, but a spiritual community that is dependent on the presence of Jesus and not the two or the three.  

If we are looking for an image of the church, we need to look no further than a gathering as simple as the one Jesus creates with His words and His incarnate presence.  This we know because it is the witness of the Word, but also because we have encountered such moments in the presence of a few and Jesus.  I remember a moment when a piece of toast and a cup of grape juice was taken from a hospital tray and turned into the holy meal.  Besides myself there was present in that room the soul waiting in the bed, two others standing alongside and Jesus.  Had the meal been offered in a grand cathedral by a robed priest, it could not have been a more sacred gathering of the church.  

The Voice

The Voice is heard faintly in the distance.  Not here, but there. Maybe a whispering, but more like far away murmuring.  Never quite clear enough for distinct sounding words.  More like the awareness of a sound.  No thundering roaring Voice like Moses heard on the holy mountain.  Nothing to cause trembling, only leaning forward to hear.  It is the Voice of must be, not the One of there it is.  Those who hear the distance soft speaking know it is Him for they have heard Him in days that have lead to the present one.    

This Voice is the One that belongs to God.  There are surely times when it is overwhelming to the ears and heart such as that moment Saul rode on the Damascus Road, but more have heard it like the old prophet Elijah who huddled fearfully in a cave.  The "sound of sheer silence" (I Kings 19:12) is how the Holy Spirit described the Voice of God as He spoke to the prophet of unfinished business.  Those who have not heard this Voice have indeed roamed too far from home; yet, even these whose ears have grown dull still belong to the One of the eternal Voice.  He never ceases calling out their names in the darkness they have chosen. 

Let no one think that they live beyond the hearing of the Holy Voice.  Let no one think that the Voice does not exist.  Let no one think the Voice is no longer spoken in their presence.  There is no corner of Creation where it does not sound forth.  It is heard here and at the ends of the earth.  When David asked, "...where can I flee from Your presence?"  (Psalm 139:7), he knew the answer.  God is present in the everywhere of Creation and from there the Voice always speaks into the here of our life.  Listen to the whispering in the distance.  It will come and be like the sound of rushing overwhelming Wind.  

Words About Grace

Grace is never deserved.  Grace is always given, or it ceases to be grace.  Grace is about receiving.  Grace is to the soul as blood is to the human body.  To reach the years defined as older enables us to know that life is about grace received and grace given.  "To whom much is given, much is expected..." (Luke 12:48) is a Biblical word that is used often in the context of stewardship, but when taken seriously it ripples across the whole of life.  Even as the gift of grace overflows the spiritual containers of our life, so is it to spill out into the lives of those around us.    

In a recent reading it was pointed out that the church and those of us who are its loyalist live more by the Ten Commandments than the Eight Beatitudes.  One takes us down the road of judgment and the other takes us down the road of grace.  When our life is in a mess because of the wrong choices we have made, we really need no one to tell us how sinful we are, but what we need is someone to assure us that there is forgiveness in the grace of God.  Sometimes life asks us to give ourselves grace and sometimes it asks us to give grace to others.  When anyone of us reflects honestly over the years that are past, we realize that we have gotten thus far because of the grace of God.  

This grace is not just shown in the number of years we have lived, but in the way it has given us permission to live as one who is enabled to live without carrying shame and self reproach from the past into the future God is unfolding before us.  When we have sinned and made a mess of our life, we did not receive a "wink" or a "pass" from God, but forgiveness.  We received grace.  The Scripture tells us "as far as the east is from the west, so far He removes our transgressions from us."  (Psalm 103:12).  As He has given to us, so may we give to others.  

Making Disciples

The traditional mission language of the church has been lost in a contemporary sea of words that are meant to be compatible with the culture, ambiguous rather than specific, and trendy rather than theological.  In my own Methodist tradition, the mission statement usually includes the words, "Making disciples."  Certainly it is a Scriptural mandate which came from the mouth of Jesus.  In Matthew 28:19 we hear those final words of Jesus, "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them...and teaching them..."  

It would seem that such a mission statement would create a strongly evangelistic church with a focus on making new disciples, but instead most churches have settled with making better disciples rather than new ones.  This is to say the contemporary sermon is more likely to be inspirational and instructive rather than persuasive in calling the non-disciples to become disciples.  The assumption of many preachers, with which I strongly disagree, is that everyone present is already a disciple.  To those who would disagree, I would ask where is the language of conversion, or has it become an anachronism?  Why is it that the church records so few baptisms?  Why does the church depend more on biological growth and sheep stealing than growth from new believers?  How can the church intent on making disciples continue to send people to the uttermost parts of the earth without seeing its own neighborhood?  

We can encourage people to be the hands and feet of Jesus, but we also need to be calling them to give their heart to Him before they go.  Maybe today's church is uncomfortable with the traditional call to become disciples, but if we continue to ignore what it sought to do, the church will join the dinosaurs in the graveyard of history.

Hearing and Doing

When Jesus came to the end of what we know as the Sermon on the Mount, He made it clear that hearing what he said and shaking our heads in agreement is not enough.  "Everyone then who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man..." (Matthew 7:24). If what we hear is not something which causes us to act, then our ear energy has been wasted.  James the Apostle underscores the importance of action when he wrote in his epistle, "What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if you have faith but do not have works?...So faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead. (James 2:14, 17).   There is no way to take Jesus seriously without understanding that following Him requires doing.  

Matthew 25 lifts up the imperative of doing things like feeding the hungry, giving the thirsty a drink, welcoming the stranger, clothing the naked, caring for the sick, and visiting those imprisoned.  Jesus calls those who follow Him to look outward to be his hands and feet in ministry.  The life of a disciple, however, is not just defined as a life of social activism.  As we consider the body of the Sermon on the Mount, it is clear that following Jesus also means looking inward and allowing the enabling power of His words to do a work of inner transformation.   It is not a one or the other way of life.  We cannot follow Jesus and be the social activist and neither can we follow Him as the mystic who is concerned only about his or her own heart.  

Instead of being one or the other, it is both.  There are no exceptions.  No matter how uncomfortable one side of this spiritual equation might make us, we cannot ignore the needs of the heart for the needs of others and neither can we ignore the needs of others for the needs of the heart.  It is like breathing in and breathing out.  Life can be sustained only as we breathe air in and out.  So it is with our life as a disciple.  We cannot breathe the air of discipleship without nurturing our own soul and caring for the needs of others.  When we take Jesus seriously, there is no other option.   

The Cupboard Mouse

What shall I do, O Lord?

   There is this restlessness

      gnawing in the stillness,

         which like a cupboard mouse

          grows quiet in the darkness

            whenever I draw near. 

"Tis a drawing with no end.

 

Beyond the reach of knowing

    this unrest moves and stirs,

      keeping me wondering

         what words You are saying

           that my heart cannot hear.

             Straining to hear helps not

on this side of the veil.

 

This deep inner stirring

    persists in the silence.

      Heard not and then again.

        Like the mouse, elusive,

          quick to come, quick to go

            and, I, always behind

knowing, but not knowing.

 

I can only wait, O Lord.

   You sent the restlessness

      that stirs the deep longing, 

        for whatever it is 

          beyond what I can hear.

             The Holy Wind whispers

the sound I strain to know.      

Longing to Hear

In his book "Falling Forward,"  Richard Rohr wrote, "There is a deeper voice of God, which you must learn to hear and obey in the second half of life.  It will sound an awful lot like the voice of risk, of trust, of surrender, of soul, of common sense, of destiny, of love, of an intimate stranger, of your deepest self..."  As I pondered his words, I found myself being drawn to the familiar words of the 42nd Psalm.  "As the deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for You, O God.  My soul thirsts for God, for the living God."  (Psalm 42:1-2)    

"Longing" is a deeper word.  It conveys something beyond mere wanting.  It speaks of the unfulfilled.  It points us toward what is sensed, but not yet known or seen.  To long is to go beyond some superficial wanting.  It speaks, instead, of a desire that is intense, full of fervency, and a sense that life demands it to be alive.  It takes us to that famous passage from St. Augustine's Confessions in which Augustine states, "You have made us for Yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you."    When we come to a time of sensing that there is a deeper voice of God which has been heard only as a whisper, we find ourselves walking with our ears attuned to the smallest sounds and our eyes darting here and there seeking what we know will only be glimpsed for a moment.   

It is like we have sensed the rustling behind a thin invisible veil which separates here from there and we are left standing in some kind tip toe anticipation as we wait for what it is that God may be saying, or where it is that God might be leading.  Even though the risk of the unknown which is surely unfolding is frightening and full of uncertainty, having heard the murmuring whispers draws us as surely as the deer run ragged from the chase seeks the cool refreshing water.  Hearing and knowing no longer is an option, but is, instead, what is necessary for the life that is still coming to us.

Political Commentary

Public praying is not an opportunity for political commentary.  Jesus said when teaching the disciples their most memorable lesson about prayer, "Pray then in this way.  Our Father in heaven...."  (Mathew 6:9).  To hear this simple word is to hear a word which tells us that prayer is spiritual communication with God the Father.  When public prayer turns into political commentary, it loses its spiritual dimension and it ceases to be something directed toward God.  Instead, it becomes a verbal monologue directed toward the ears of those who have gathered with the purpose of worshiping God.   

When political commentary is disguised as prayer, it may be acceptable to those of the same political persuasion, but it is sure to cause those on the other side of the commentary to feel that they have become a captive audience in a forum where they have no voice.  Whatever spirit of worship that might be in the gathering place is suddenly quenched for half of the congregation.   Perhaps, the one offering the political commentary via prayer is of the opinion that God needs to informed, or advised, but, of course, no assumption could be farther from the truth.  God is the God of the nations and is the God who understands the political processes which are at work among the nations.   

This is not to say that the issues which prompt the ill advised political commentary are not issues for praying.  If there is concern of some political issues, or some injustice, and some national debate it is better to go to the core of the concern.  We can pray "...let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream" (Amos 5:24) without turning our concern into a political tirade that can only cause some to look for the exit signs and God to wonder if what was directed toward Him was not actually misdirected.

Public Prayers

Praying aloud in public is tricky business.  Jesus sounded a warning when He said, "And whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, so that they may be seen by others." (Matthew 6:5). Another word of caution is offered a few verses later as Jesus says, "When you are praying, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think they will be heard because of their many words." (Matthew 6:7). As one who has offered several thousand pastoral prayers over forty years for congregations, I have come to value this means of intercession while understanding some of the dangers of such praying.   

One way to speak of what is happening with the congregation when public prayers are offered is that it is an opportunity to sweep up the diverse needs of the gathered people and offer them to God.  Anyone who pauses before praying to look the congregation in the eye understands that such a moment is not one to be entered lightly.  Every gathered congregation of God's people collectively bring enough hurts, disappointments, and brokenness to fill more than one large bucket.  Bringing the congregation to a place where each one feels that the offered prayers has touched the needs of their heart is no easy task, but is surely the goal of any spiritual leader who seeks to be pastoral and priestly in the moment of intercessory prayer.   

The one who offers public prayer in worship wants people to not only listen, but to be so caught up that affirming words like "Yes, Lord," or "Amen" are rising from the heart.  For the congregation the morning prayer, or the pastoral prayer, should be not just a moment for listening, but a moment for praying alongside the one whose voice is leading them before the throne of grace and mercy.  Such moments within worship are not spectator moments, but times for participation in the intercession.  While it may be true that only one person's voice is being heard, it is the congregation praying silently underneath the spoken words which surely speeds the heart and spirit of the praying toward heaven.

Radical Discipleship

Following Jesus is about more than getting our name on a church membership roll.  One of the first churches I served provided a free burial plot which I was told had put more than just a few names in the membership book.  While that sounds a bit crass, it is also true that some folks do join a church for all sorts of reasons which really have nothing to do with affirming faith in Christ.  Following Jesus is also about more than being sprinkled, or immersed, or poured, or touched in some way by baptismal waters.  Becoming a follower of Jesus is not some benign act which has no real impact on the way life is lived.  On the contrary, following Jesus is a radical decision.  It speaks of change that turns life around and upside down.  

When Jesus spoke to the seeking rich young man whose story is told in the 19th chapter of Matthew, he pointed him to a radical lifestyle change.  "go," He said, "sell your possessions, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me."  (Matthew 19:21).  In another place at another time Jesus told His disciples, "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me."  (Matthew 16:24). None of these words of Jesus sound like the rather dressed up words of commitment to which we responded one Sunday morning when we signed up as a member of the church.  

While those Sunday moments of commitment are viewed more as a rite of passage for the young about to be confirmed, or a social event for the more established members of the community, it is in fact a moment which is meant to open up believers to a world of radical possibilities.   Those who have will be called to share with the have nots, the ones who have clean hands will experience the necessity of getting them dirty, and the ones with hearts bent on looking out after self will be challenged to make service more of a priority than accumulating more.  If our following Jesus has lost its radical nature then maybe there is a need to go back to the beginning place.

Letting Go and Being Content

Like so many of us, the rich young man whose story is told in Matthew 19 could not turn loose of everything and be content with nothing.  He lived miles away from the Apostle Paul who wrote, "I have learned to be content with whatever I have.  I know what it is to have plenty and I know what it is to have little."  (Philippians 4:11-12).  What Paul held did not hold the Apostle, but what the rich young man held had a strangle hold on him.  The man of the gospel story realized his loss for he grieved in his spirit as he walked away, but still he walked away with what he thought was everything when it was actually nothing. 

It is only when we learn that everything is nothing and that nothing is everything that we are finally able to freely live.  Instead of understanding that everything is nothing, we turn it into something which gives our life meaning.  Our reward for holding tightly to everything is to lose our life which is what the rich young man realized he was losing as he walked away with all that held him so tightly he could not let it go.  On the other hand, being content with nothing means there is not anything which we hold that cannot be turned loose.  As Jesus reminds us it is in the giving away, the life of letting go of everything, that enables us to embrace the abundant life which He offers.  In Matthew 16:25 we hear Jesus saying, "For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for may sake will find it."  

It is indeed a strange word for those who like the rich young man want to find the way to eternal life.  He was a man who held tightly to his possessions, but also a man who held tightly to the illusion that he could control everything about his life.  At the core of his spirit was the belief that anything, even eternal life, could be attained by doing which is why he asked Jesus.  "What must I do?...(Tell me and I will do it.)"  In the final analysis it was more than money the rich young man had to turn lose.  He was being called to let go of his life, but he could not be content without having it and being in control of it.  

White Knuckle Holding

We all know his story.  He came to Jesus with a legitimate question, "Teacher, what good deed must I do to have eternal life?"  (Matthew 19:16)  If there is a definitive answer, we would all like to know.  The problem is that the young man who asked it and ended up hearing an answer he did not want to hear could be anyone of us.  He was religious.  He knew right from wrong and toed the mark.  He was a member of his religious community, knew its foundational tenets, and lived by them.  He was a decent and honorable person who was well regarded in the community.   

There is a part of us which wants to declare Jesus too hard on him.  Maybe we feel that way because we feel like he is us and the answer is too hard for us as well.  Jesus told him, "...go, sell your. possessions, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, and follow me."  (Matthew 19:21).  The young man heard and, "went away grieving, for he had many possessions."  (Matthew 19:22).   For the sake of getting him on board as a follower, Jesus could have offered an easier word.   The truth is none of us can really walk the road of discipleship with Jesus until we learn to be content with nothing.  

We hold on to everything which is a part of our life with a white knuckle grip.  What we hold with this white knuckle grip is not so much stuff as it is what has such a hold on us that we cannot envision life without it.  It could be money.  It could be a relationship.  It could be status.  It could be more things than can be named.  We are not free to live until we learn to be content with nothing.  Only when we learn to be content with nothing are we free to receive what is out there and not yet here, but coming.  Only when we are content with nothing can we forsake all and really go after Jesus.   

Hard Moments

After Elijah announced to Ahab, the King, that there was going to be a drought with the words, "As the Lord the God of Israel lives, before whom I stand, there shall be neither dew nor rain these years, except by my word," (I Kings 17:1), he went as he was told to the Wadi Cherith where he was fed by the ravens and drank from the wadi.  (A wadi is a dry river bed in a valley that is filled by rain.)  With no rain the wadi was bound to become hard dry dirt which it did and Elijah the man who did what God told him to do was without water.    

It might have been a hard moment for Elijah to embrace.  Perhaps, he figured the stream would not run dry since he was doing what God had told him to do. He had taken great risk in telling the King a drought was coming and the prophet might have thought that somehow he would receive some special provision for his faithfulness.  It is, of course, a temptation many of us find staring at us.  When some tragedy overcomes the comfort of our routine living, we are apt to whine to God.  We might hear ourselves telling Him we deserve better since we are one of the faithful ones.   Unfortunately, there are no exemptions.  Embedded in the Sermon on the Mount are those words of Jesus which tell us, "...He (the Father in Heaven) makes His sun rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous."  (Matthew 5:45).  

To expect some kind of exemption from difficulty as a reward for faithfulness means we are going to live with frustration and disappointment.  The disciples with the exception of John died the death of a martyr and Jesus, the very Son of God, suffered and died a horrible death on a cross.  While our questions will always grab hold of us as we go through some of the hard times of life, what we do come to know through the experience of going through a few of them is that God is not absent, nor is He uncaring, but out there in what seems to be uncontrollable chaos working to bring us through what we cannot pass alone.

As Floods Rage

Chaos, have you returned

    to live and dwell with us, 

      to ravage and bring ruin, 

        to let your darkness shine

          against the light that was,

the one that gave us life?

 

Harbinger of darkness,

    why do you hate order

      that provides and protects 

        fragile creatures like us

          from the monsters 'round us,

            that rage and roar and kill?

Will you not ever cease?

 

Listen, worker of woe,

     you reign but a moment,

       you take all, but not hope.

         Where you sow seeds of loss,

           the Sower sows good seeds,

             the kind meant to bring good

to broken ones He loves.

A Longer View

There are times when it is good, and maybe even necessary to step back, sit down, and empty ourselves of all the disturbing stuff which swirls around us.  Maybe this fourth of July is a moment for laying aside our rancorous political debate which leads only to division among us and look at what might be considered the longer view.  Nations are like people.  There are here and then they are gone.  Any serious study of the life of the great nations of the past provide the truth of this observation.  Another thing often forgotten is that God has a hand in nation making and nation breaking.   

The Bible is a sacred writing which reminds us again and again that God is One who uses individuals and nations to accomplish His purpose.  Any study of the Old Testament lifts up this truth.  Psalms 22:28 tells us, "For dominion belongs to the Lord and He rules over the nations."  Daniel 4:17 enables us to hear, "...the Most High is sovereign over the kingdom of mortals..."   A word from the gospels tells us of a day still to come when "All the nations will be gathered before Him..."  (Matthew 25:32).   To read the Scripture with the larger view is to see a God who has created and who remains sovereign over all that He has created including the nations.  

There is no way to read the Word without seeing the reality that God uses nations to accomplish His purposes.  One of the problems with which we struggle is we want change now.  We live with more than a little impatience with the slow moving God who seems to be inching His Kingdom forward.  What we can know is that in a world which always seems to be taking two steps back, God is still the One who is in charge and who reigns not only over the nation in which we live, but all the others as well.  

Two Views

The parable in the 12th chapter of Luke gives us two views of the same man.  The first view is the one the farmer has of himself.  After a successful harvest he says, "Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years: relax, eat, drink, and be merry." (Luke 12:19).  The second view is the one of God.  "You fool!  This very night your life is being demanded of you.  And the things you have prepared, whose will they be?  So it is with those who store up treasures for themselves but are not rich toward God."  (Luke 12:20-21). The farmer with the abundant harvest lived as if he was going to live forever on this earth, but, of course, none of us do.   

When I came to the farm some fifteen years ago, I started seeing things that were older and which would most likely be here when I am gone.  Some of the trees around the farm have watched several generations of folks toil in the dirt.  And the dirt itself is as old as creation itself.  As I began to see, I started seeing that no matter how many years I might live, I was always going to be the short timer around here.  Life is both fragile and finite.  It has a beginning and an end.  All of this speaks not of fatalism or pessimism, but of realism.  It speaks of the reality that life depends not on what I do, but upon God.  God is the One who gives life.  He is the One who sustains life.  

Even as our first days on earth are in His hands, so will be our last ones. While the Scripture speaks of heaven being our home, we know, too, that our time here on this earth among those we love is a treasured gift.  None of us are eager to cease breathing this earth's air.  The life we live is a precious gift of grace from God.  The farmer in the parable who thought he was self made was called a fool because he failed to live grateful to the Creator for the gift of abundant land, health to enjoy it, and every other gift of grace which was being poured into his life.  

Quenching Generosity

Nothing quenches  generosity like forgetting who we are.  The person who thinks it is all about me is not likely to have a generous spirit.  Instead, such a person is more likely to get caught up in the seductive power of accumulation.  When we read the parable known as the parable of the rich fool found in the 12th chapter of Luke, we see a farmer who is successful, but who also takes all the credit for what the land has produced.  When we read the parable and underline every time "I" or "my" appears, we begin to catch a glimpse of what makes the man think of himself as self made and what makes God think of him as a fool.  

The point of the parable is made clear as we hear Jesus saying, "Take care!  Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; for one's life does not consist in the abundance of possessions."  (Luke 12:15).  Allowing ourselves to get caught up in a life of accumulating, a life of having more, and a life of storing up things not really necessary for living is a perversion of life as God intended for us to live it.  When accumulating more takes hold of us, there is little room for generosity because the god of accumulating never lets us feel that we have enough.  If one barn is good, two is better.  If a lot is good, more is better.  There is no end to satisfying such a god.  

According to the Word of God, we are not defined by what we have, but by how we love.  Love requires care for others.  It seeks what is good for another.  At another time Jesus told a rich young man, "...sell your possessions, and give the money to the poor, and then you will have treasures in heaven..." (Matthew 19:21).  The young man who heard these words walked away because, "he had many possessions."  (Matthew 19:22).  Jesus said it in plainly when he said, "You cannot serve God and wealth." (Matthew 6:24).   God calls us to love Him and others which, of course, we cannot do when our fist is closed tightly around what we mistakenly think of as mine.

I Get Him

I get it how he did it.  The story of the guy who did it is found in the 12th chapter of Luke.  Actually, the guy may not have existed since he is the main character in a parable of Jesus, but then again, Jesus could well have run across him somewhere on his walking across the countryside.  He is the guy about whom the Scripture says, "The land of a rich man produced abundantly."  (Luke 12:16).  I can imagine him looking at the harvest while feeling the buttons on his robe popping with a chest swelled with pride.  "What should I do...I will do this, I will pull down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grains and goods.  (Luke 12:17-18).   

I really do get him.  It is easy to be that guy.  Over the last few days the hay was cut and baled.  At the end of the day yesterday a glance across the farm showed some fifty or so big round bales harvested.  Being a part of a crop that is produced from the earth has been a new experience for me since leaving the pulpit.  There is a special kind of fulfillment felt when the pecan crop is loaded an on the way to market, or some new calves are birthed in the pasture, or the hay bales stand in the field.  It is easy to fall into the trap of the guy in the parable and think about what I have done.  Of course, the key to the parable and as well as our living is found in that first verse which says, "The land of a rich man produced abundantly."   

The farmer of the parable had nothing to do with the inherent power of the land to produce abundantly.  Oh, he might tend it and care for it, but it is a gift of God as is the rain and sunshine.  Even the best farmer is a partner with the God of creation and without the Creator, the farmer produces nothing.  It was that way before I became a farmer.  When my labors were made evident with a check at the end of the month, it was still because of a partnership with the God of Creation who provided what I needed to live and feel fulfilled.  Regardless of what we do, it is what God does that counts the most.  It is not about us, but about Him and the partnership He through His grace enables us to share. 

Journey Thoughts

There are times when our own journey gives us not understanding, but a measure of insight,  into the journey someone else must walk.  As we watch there is a part of us which wants to cry, "Watch out!" and, perhaps, we do, but it largely goes unheard by ears which are not yet ready to hear.  The truth is there are paths we all must walk alone.  Others may stand along the way, or be seen up there ahead of us, but it still remains the walk we must walk alone. What is happening in those moments of struggling to move forward when everything within us longs to cling to what is behind us is the creation of someone who has never before existed.  

As surely as we say good bye and turn lose of something or someone we thought to be necessary for life itself, we enter into a season of change.  It is most commonly known as a season of grief. It might also be called a season of becoming.  The seasons of becoming are often not welcomed seasons for there is nothing we count more dear to our existence than the status quo.  The status quo is where we know comfort.  It is where we know our way.  It is where we regard ourselves as being in control.  To suddenly be confronted with the lie which we have convinced ourselves to be true is an earthshaking and jolting moment.   We all have memories of places we did not want to leave, loved ones we wanted to keep close for a lifetime, and dreams we carried with us so long they lost their life.  What we also often remember are not moments of gently and willingly leaving, but somehow being thrust forward by some unexpected circumstance of life.  

While some might speak of such thrusting as a dynamic of life, others call and affirm as the pushing and prodding of the Holy Spirit.  His task is often to pry us loose from where we are, where we want to be, but also where we need to leave.  Life can never be about looking behind us at what has been left.  It is always about looking to see what God is unfolding before us. It may take some time.  We may not want to see, but God is patient and steadfast and can be counted on to take us down the road away from where we have been to where we are going.  

Just Personal Stuff

I read a lot.  Always have.  Since the days my mother took me to the public library for a children's summer reading program, I have been reading.  Some kids looked forward to the ice cream truck driving into the neighborhood and I was one of them, but I also loved to see the bookmobile coming down the street.  The ice cream truck cost money which I did not always have.  The bookmobile was a free treat!  I not only read a lot, but I often read a good book more than once which explains why I am reading once again a book by Richard Rohr entitled, "Falling Upward."   

 Rohr is not only a writer, but a Franciscan priest.  As I was reading I came across these words which I had underlined the first time. "Thomas Merton, the American monk, pointed out that we may spend our whole life climbing the ladder of success, only to find out when we get to the top that our ladder is leaning against the wrong wall."  When I read these words I did not say "Amen," but "Ouch!"  I know a number of folks who have made it to the place in life that I have arrived and look back with the realization that their ladder was against the wrong wall.  Too many of us put our ladder on the wall of getting ahead, or self aggrandizement, or maybe doing what is expected instead of what the heart is calling us to do.    

In moments of personal reflection I often wonder if I did not start out ministry serving the Christ, but somewhere along the way started serving the church.  I wonder sometimes if my ladder was not leaned up against the wall of helping the institutional church survive rather than against the wall of being willing to lose all in order to serve the Christ.  Just my personal stuff, but then we all have our own stuff, our own ladders, and our own walls.  Writers and thinkers like Richard Rohr are not necessarily enjoyable to read, but they certainly keep us honest with ourselves.