Pretend Worship

After preaching for 43 years, it took some time to become accustomed to sitting in the pews.  What afflicted me at first was a certainty that all the good preachers had retired with me.  Next came a serious case of "there is a better way of doing everything."  One of the things I learned during those years is that it is hard to really worship with the people of God when you are infected with a critical and judgmental spirit.  Every now and again that spirit shows itself when I settle in my place in the pew, but it is mostly gone now except as a memory.    

We do need to be careful what we take to worship.  Jesus points this out to us in one of His Sermon on the Mount teachings.  "So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift."  (Matthew 5:23-24). The prophet Amos spoke of how displeased God is when we come to worship focusing on the external acts of worship without looking at our hearts.  "let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream."  (Amos 5:21-24).  

As we hear the prophetic words of Amos, we must remember that righteousness is not some super spiritual condition, but instead is a word that speaks of being in a right relationship with God and those around us.  I remember from one of my churches two men had such ill will toward each other that they would not come to the table together for Holy Communion.  With that in their hearts, I often wondered why they came at all.  What we bring with us to worship is important.  It may be the difference between worship that is acceptable and pleasing to God and pretend worship.

The Failure of Effort

Some of us have read the "fruit of the Spirit" passage the Apostle Paul wrote long ago and figured we could make it happen in our life.  What we discovered very soon is that determination and will power was not the viable word.  As we found out after times of trying to make ourselves into someone whose life reflected these qualities or virtues, the operative word was surrender.  It was a case when "my will" was insufficient and "His will" pointed to the only way.  We know the passage well.  "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."   (Galatians 5:22-23)

Where we have trouble is in the unguarded moments when spontaneous response takes the place of a planned response.  We may be loving and gentle in moments anticipated and for which we feel prepared, but let someone come along with something which goes against the grain of our plans or expectations, and something other than the fruit of the Spirit may surface.  The words Paul wrote are not about a plan for action, but about what the Holy Spirit can do in our life when we have surrendered it to His agenda.  

What the Spirit seeks to do is a transforming work of grace which shapes our spirit so that it begins to resemble the heart of Christ.  The more we allow the Spirit to control our life, the more we will naturally respond to the unplanned moments with the grace inherent within this fruit of the Spirit passage.  This passage from Galatians points us toward a way of life and not toward creating certain spiritual virtues in our life.  The way of life to which Paul points us can be realized in our life, but it will never be the result of our efforts, but according to our willingness to submit ourselves completely to His will. 

Flowing Rivulets

There have been times when the Kingdom of God has made itself know in our midst like a mighty tsunami that changed the landscape forever.  When Jesus taught about the Kingdom of God, He likened it to simple ordinary things which moved in inches.  Like a tiny mustard seed is the Kingdom.  At other times He spoke of it as something hidden such as a treasure in a field.  In contrast to these images there is the Day of Pentecost when the Kingdom of God poured upon the earth and into the hearts of people in such a way as to literally change the world.  There have also been other dramatic and powerful movements of the Spirit through revivals such as the Great Awakening, or through the persuasive ministry of some of the spiritual giants who have stood revealing a Kingdom powerfully advancing.   

Still another way to think about the Kingdom is to image a pool of water that is spilling over not in a torrent, but as a hundred rivulets of water slowly moving away from its source.  Such has been the history of the spiritual community known as the church.  What started with the twelve called to be disciples and Apostles has steadily grown in numbers as the message of Jesus went forth from Jerusalem to the churches of Asia Minor to Rome and to the rest of the world.  Steadily it has grown and gone.  If something appeared as a barrier, the Spirit pushed and created another channel for it to flow.  

The Kingdom of God invisible to some and powerfully present to others has prevailed into the present moment and though some speak of its demise, it is of God and will prevail in the the form He has designed for it. Today it is not the twelve who advance the Kingdom, but millions of folks like us whose lives have been radically transformed by an encounter with the living Christ.  Because of that encounter, we are not the same and the places where we move as a modern rivulet of living water can never be same as well

Easter is Coming

Lent is traditionally a season of preparing new converts for their baptism.  In its earlier days it was also a season when those who had through their sin separated themselves from the church could be restored.  Easter was and still is a traditional time for baptisms in the church.  In many places the baptisms have been moved to Palm Sunday or another Sunday since Easter is such a busy Sunday.  Folks still want to be in worship on Easter which is a good thing, but when the lunch bell at noon rings they also want to be set free to get to the eatery of choice.  Baptisms and the ritual that goes with them gets in the way of that process.   

Even at there is something unique and special about the ashes of Ash Wednesday, so is it true that there is something special about the water of baptism on Easter.  For the church to baptize new converts into faith in Jesus Christ on Easter is to step into a stream of new life that has touched and overwhelmed new believers for centuries.  In a era when old is defined as yesterday, it is good to be able to share in a spiritual ritual which has given life to the church since the days of its beginning.  When today's contemporary church culture shuns the rituals of faith that have had sustaining power for centuries, something of spiritual value is lost which cannot be replaced by some trendy substitution that will be used today and changed again tomorrow.   

Baptism is a singularly important important moment in the spiritual life of the believer.  It is also a singularly important moment in the life of the church.  In days gone by the congregation would gather at the river to share in the moment when some soul symbolically had their sins washed away.  Whether at the river or at the baptismal font, it is a serious and sacred moment which calls for celebration, but not frivolity. 

A Debt to Wesley

Back in 1971 I signed on as a Methodist preacher.  Methodist preachers were then appointed by the Bishop to go where they were assigned by him.  It was nothing like the call system which enables each church to decide who is going to be their preacher.  In this system, called the itinerant system, the preacher goes where sent.  The upside for the preacher is that he or she is guaranteed a place to preach and serve.  I remember my Dad, also a Methodist preacher, going to Annual Conference where such decisions were finalized, and calling home to tell us where we were going to be moving the next week.   

Over the years of my ministry, the system softened to allow for preachers to have input through a consultation process though the Bishop still had the final word.  There were times when the system seemed to break down as larger churches started sending their preference to the Bishop who seemed to be guided by their request.  During these last fifty years it often appeared that larger more monied churches were treated differently than some of the smaller struggling congregations.  Of course, all of this is simply a personal perception which may not have anything to do with reality.   

A recent note from a life long friend and colleague in ministry sent me down the rabbit hole of reflection.  I will be the first one to admit that the Methodist Church was a flawed church when I was ordained.  It remains so.  I also know that I am a Wesleyan.  John Wesley's theology is the foundation for what I believe.  I will always be a debtor to the church that baptized me, introduced me to Jesus, blessed my marriage, educated me, and gave me a place to preach and serve Christ.  I do not overlook or ignore what I believe to be a dangerous move toward becoming a church influenced too much by the consensus of culture instead of the Holy Spirit, but it is still the church of my spiritual roots as well as where I experience family.  For this church I pray that the heart and spirit of Wesley will always shine as a beacon beckoning us forward. 

The Bothersome Thing

I am a small town guy.  Big cities seem like roaring beasts.  A city is a place empty of silence and filled with the constant roar of expressway traffic.  Whenever some green space gets too green, bulldozers and builders congregate to cover more dirt with concrete so another towering building can be sent skyward.  Night time lights hide stars and moon, people live at elbow length without knowing one another, and walls become canvases for graffiti artist.  The modern urban environment simply overwhelms the senses of this man whose heart belongs to the small town.    

What makes me most uncomfortable about the city is something which is never seen in the small town I call home.  In the small town which has my post office box there is no homeless community.  There are no people with cardboard signs at the only intersection of my town.  There are no tent communities filled with folks pushing shopping carts.  It always jolts something deep inside of me when I come to the end of a busy city street and find my field of vision filled with tents and makeshift shelters which surely cannot provide protection from the rain.  Any sense of personal comfort is shattered in a moment.  One part of me says I should do something.  Another part says there is nothing I can do.  I suppose I could see and not see, but once seen is always seen.  

What is also true is that once we walk with Jesus and listen long enough to what He is saying about caring for the poor among us, we cannot live without knowing that we have heard what we do not want to hear.  When confronted with what was seen as an impossible task of feeding five thousand hungry people, the disciples wondered what to do and Jesus said, "....you give them something to eat..."  (Matthew 14:16). What is most bothersome about the whole business is that He is still saying the same thing to us. 

Hearing and Action

Some verses of Scripture bring comfort to us.  To think of verses that bring comfort is to remember the 23rd Psalm.  A verse which has led many a soul to the altar is John 3:16.  Other verses are like south Georgia sandspurs.  Sandspurs are pesky, tenacious, and painfully bothersome.  A sandspur will get picked up on your jeans, go with you to the house, go through a washer and dryer cycle, and be right there to stick you the next time you put on those clean blue jeans.    

So has been my relationship with I John 3:17-18 which says, "How does God's love abide in anyone who has the world's goods and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses help? Little children, let us love, not in word or speech, but in truth and action."  I read those words, think I have responded rightly, and then run into a situation which sticks me again in such a way that the only thing I can say is, "Lord, have mercy."  There was a moment a few days ago when I sensed that I should give my coat away, but by the time the thought made the journey from my head to my heart, it was too late.  Before that missed opportunity the Lord spoke a word about caring not for the entire homeless community, but for some individuals who come my way and I continue to ponder the plan instead of acting on it.   

Those of us who have a relationship of sorts through this blog are part of an affluent community.  We may not count ourselves among the world's richest, but we have more than what can be defined as our basic needs.  There are those around us who do not have enough.  Most of us live with a surplus.  Jesus has a word for us that we not only need to hear, but one which should push us into action. 

Sabbath Musings

Another Sunday is winding down.  There have been more Sundays in my life than I can count.  Long before I ever entertained thoughts about what it meant to "Remember the sabbath day, and keep it holy..." (Exodus 20:8), I knew by way of my Mother and Daddy that it was a special day. My Daddy who was an avid fisherman said, "No fishing on Sunday...give the fish a day of rest" and my Mother made it very simple by saying, "You can't do anything on Sunday."  Growing up in the days when the "Blue Laws" were still on the books meant Sunday was a day mostly spent at home.  Having any kind of fun was taboo. 

Years later it got a bit more complicated.  The preacher this morning preached on the text in which talked about Jesus getting in trouble with the Pharisees of His day.  They thought it wrong for Jesus to heal a man on the Sabbath.  By their rules, the broken man could wait another day to be healed.  Jesus, of course, disagreed as He was one guided by a way of life which declared that the most important thing in life was to love God completely and to love those around Him as well.  According to the morning sermon, the most important thing we have to do on the Sabbath is to live as one guided by what we know as the great commandment, the one about putting love in action anytime and everywhere.   

Maybe keeping the Sabbath holy is not so complicated.  Maybe it is a day in which we are to live loving God with all our being and our brothers and sisters as well.  In doing so we bring more honor to God than we do by slipping around doing things we hope He is not seeing.  We may even be doing more to honor Him through our loving than we do on those Sundays when we sit in church and do all the right looking things for all the wrong reasons.

Spiritual Uneasiness

From time to time, a sense of spiritual uneasiness settles down upon us.  It does not necessarily come because we have stepped out of our walk with Jesus, nor does it necessarily point to some major moment of disobedience in our life.   It may also be a way that God has of telling us we need to pay attention.  Like Jonah, we may be hearing some Word from God we do not want to hear.  There may be in us some hesitation about taking a step into the future that we, in the deep places of our heart, know He is unfolding before us.  

Remember Ananias?  He certainly had his moment of uneasiness when He heard the Lord telling him to go look for Saul of Tarsus who had come to Damascus to possibly take him and other believers like him bound in chains back to Jerusalem.  This is evident as we hear him saying into today's English, "Lord, do you know what You are talking about?"  What he knew he heard, he did not want to do and when such a moment comes to us, it is likely that we will experience spiritual uneasiness until the issue is settled with God.  The One who called us into bring does not always lead us toward what we want to do, but toward what He wants us to do.  

Let there be no question here.  What we want and what God wants are often two very different things.  When we signed on as a disciple in the beginning, we signed on for a journey to wherever and whatever.  In our act of saying "Yes" to Jesus in the quiet place of our heart as well as in the act of baptism, we declared,  "Not my will, but Yours be done."  When that spiritual uneasiness settles down on our soul, it may be a sign that we have paused in front of a moment when our abandonment to Christ is not being tested, but measured.

The Long Road

When I look back, I see a long road.  My first thoughts about God came around age seven, baptism at the altar of a Methodist Church came at age nine, and just before I got out of high school I said "Yes" to Jesus with enough stickability to take me to the present day.   This is not to say there were not those moment of losing sight of the way.  Neither can I say not say that my life has been empty of free falls from my faith.  It has not by any means been a perfect journey, but it has been the one I have had as I sought to follow Jesus.   

There were times He should have looked behind at my spiritual meandering and said "Enough.  Let that one go his way," but He never did.  I have been the recipient of more forgiving grace than the prodigal son, been given more than my share of daily provision when there was very little in the pantry, and been turned around and pointed in the right way far more than Simon Peter.  I have always said that on the day when God called me to preach, He was scraping the bottom of the barrel and with such a conviction I will go to my grave.  

It still amazes me to look back on the road and see where God chose to use me and allowed me to be part of what He was doing in His Kingdom.  I am humbled from time to time as I hear voices from the past speak of God coming to them while I was with them.  It has been a long journey that is still unfolding.  More and more do I understand how the Apostle Paul could write, "I do not consider that I have made it on my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus."  (Philippians 3:13-14)

The Blessing of Grace

Since coming to the farm, I have learned to expect God to reveal Himself and even to speak through the creation in which I live immersed.  It is not something I have always been able to do.  I suppose I was too busy with work and too bounded by my view of what someone like me built that blocked my view of the distant horizon.  It could be said that the world was a much smaller place without an unhindered view of the sprawling creation.  Not everyone can live in the country as I do.  Not everyone would be content with a town with one caution light and the post office trip being one of the more exciting things of the day.   

I count being here during this season of my life as a gift of grace.  I am privileged and blessed.  What I experience each day I wish could be the daily anticipation of everyone, but then as this old country boy could not be content in the urban world, neither could the urban dwellers be content with life here.  When I first came here, I must confess to not seeing things around me as I see them now.  It took a word from the Lord which told me "Pay Attention" and then learning to see and hear with eyes of the heart.  

What has truly surprised me about the whole journey is not just the way God has been making Himself know in the ordinary things of the creation, but also the way He has made me more attentive to people.  I still have miles to go in laying flair ups of prejudice, impatience with others, and judgement passing in the rear view mirror.  About all I can honestly say is that I am not where I was, nor am I where I hope to be, but to remember the words of the Apostle Paul, "(I) strain forward to what lies ahead,..I press on..." (Philippians 3:13). As I do, I am so very grateful for God's grace.

The Rest of the Story

Hurrying seldom pays off.  Yesterday I was given a lesson about hurrying to get somewhere.  My reason for hurrying was to get to a doctor appointment on time.  I wolfed down breakfast, spoke the language of hurrying which only creates anxiety, and then suffered a major patience breakdown every time traffic required slowing down.  Amazingly, I arrived with fifteen minutes to spare.  At my appointment time I was in the exam room waiting for the doctor to appear.  I sat there and sat there and sat there some more.  An hour and fifteen minutes later the doctor walks in, apologizes for the delay, and then gets down to business.    

I could not believe that all my hurrying was wasted.  I got there early and then had to wait for over an hour.  Does God have a sense of humor, or not?  Maybe the long wait was not so much about humor as me doing penance for not paying attention to the many gifts God was giving me throughout the day.  If the long wait after hurrying was my punishment for not being present in the present moment and for not receiving with gratitude the gifts He was giving throughout the day, I suppose I must acknowledge it was a light punishment with a tinge of irony.    

Whether the waiting was a divine reminder about the futility of living a hurried life, I cannot say for sure, but I do know the whole day was an example of what happens when we live out of sync with the Creator and the creation in which He has immersed us.  Living in a hurry creates this internal rush of gut churning anxiety.  It also causes us to be so preoccupied with ourselves that we cannot be attentive to the needs of those around us.  We were not created to hurry.  Everything has its season and there is no need to rush any single day of anyone of them.  All it does is get us out of step with whatever it is that God might intend for us to be about in the day He is giving us.

Scrambled Eggs

Life is not meant to be lived in a hurry.  It is disrespectful of life.  It is disrespectful of the gift God is giving to us in the present moment.  This morning I ate my breakfast standing up at the kitchen counter.  Usually, breakfast is slowly and deliberately eaten at the table which has as its sole purpose providing a space for meals and conversation.  Today I disrespected my scrambled eggs.  I convinced myself that being somewhere else more quickly was more important than the moment God had given for breakfast.  Perhaps, it was not just the eggs I disrespected, but God.    

What I did not have time for in the morning was receiving and experiencing with appropriate gratitude the gift that He was giving to me.  Granted that two eggs is not much.  It is not like a bag of gold.  It is not like a bag of gold unless your pantry is empty and you have watched your children stand in front of it wondering if there was going to be anything to eat today.  This morning I disrespected two scrambled eggs.  This morning I disrespected God's gift to me.  This morning I disrespected the hunger of souls whom God has told me are brothers and sisters.   

How can I say there is nothing about which I need to repent during these holy days of Lent?  How can I move deeper into the worship being offered without coming to terms with the ugliness of the sin I see lying dormant in my heart?  The Holy Spirit has brought a latent sense of conviction to me in these evening hours.  I never expected my soul to be so exposed by two scrambled eggs.  There is nothing in all the creation that God has put in place which hurries except me, and perhaps, those like me.  "Lord, hear my confession.  Lord, forgive me.  Lord, have mercy.  Amen."

Seemed Like Easter

It seemed like Easter Sunday this morning when I opened the front door and stepped out on the porch.  Maybe it was just that it was Sunday.  Or, perhaps, it was the morning sun that followed a stormy night which filled so many with apprehension of what might be and others with the reality of what could be.  Out on the porch all those night time anxieties were pushed away by a gentle blowing wind filled with the smell of moisture in the air doused with a gracious hint of Spring.  Being out there on the front porch on the way to worship caused me to pause and say to the creation around me, "Feels like Easter!"   

It was certainly one way to describe the greeting received by all that was filling my senses in those morning moments.  The first Easter, or Resurrection Sunday, as I am prone to call it came only after a violent storm which filled the world of the cross with an overwhelming deep darkness and a shaking of the earth that tore stones apart as well as the sacred veil in the Temple.  The conflict between good and evil first seen in the Garden of Eden was like a Sunday School class compared to the conflict which took place on mount Calvary.  If ever there was a moment in which the Devil himself declared victory, it was when the bloodied and empty of breath body of Jesus was dropped from the cross.  

And if ever there was a moment when the evil one knew his power was broken and could never prevail, it was that morning when the stone was rolled away from an empty tomb and the resurrected Jesus roamed the garden.  When I stepped off the porch onto the ground on the way to worship, it seemed that I stepped into a holy space where everything that is was celebrating the good news shouted from the empty tomb.  As I said, it seemed like Easter!  Even though the days of Lent are still heavy in the air, I cannot help but say, "Hallelujah!"

A Precious Gift

The creation is a precious gift from God.  All we need to give and sustain life is wrapped up inside of it.  As we read those ancient words, "In the beginning when God created..." (Genesis 1:1), it is clear that all of creation is sacred.  Certainly, on those nights when we watch with apprehension and fear approaching violent weather, we wonder if the word "all" is truly appropriate.  Yet, even though the creation sometimes reveals a dark and mysterious dimension, we can only go back to those beginning words which assure us that nothing has been brought into being which has not first passed through the hands of the Creator.  As we consider such things, we surely live perplexed with the mystery of creation.    

What we do know is that as we live within the creation, we are immersed in sacred mystery which sustains us.  The land, the air, the water, the plant life that grows, and the animals which St Francis called our brothers and sisters all bear the markings of the sacred.  It is a sad moment when what is sacred is no longer honored as a gift from God, but something to be exploited for personal gain.  Of course, part of the dilemma we face is that we have become so disconnected from the creation.  

It is not that we fail to walk midst it with love and respect, but that we walk among it without seeing it.  We have forgotten the smell of the dirt, we no longer remember the feel of running water on our feet, and breathing deeply the fresh crispness of a new day is something we do not have the inclination to do.  God has graced us with such a wonderful gift.  It is a gift  that has a way of renewing itself each day despite our careless living.  Gratitude is best shown as we breathe in and then with the rest of creation breathe out our praise to the Creator of all that is and yet to be.

There and Here

One of the most surprising things about coming to the farm some fifteen years ago is the growing awareness of holy presence.  He comes in the unexpected.  This afternoon as the sun was being chased down to the edge of the distant horizon, a sudden wind picked up and blew against me as I worked with the tractor in the pasture.  It was a sudden moment of going from what declared itself to be a mundane task into one filled with the awareness of the Spirit. While some may speak of the moment as an expression of a vivid imagination, I have learned to be open and attentive to such times in ways that I never knew when life centered around the pulpit and the altar.    

This afternoon's revelation of presence has come too many times for me to delegate it to imagination.  As I rode along the edge of the fence line in the pasture this afternoon, I was reminded of the time I tried to slip up on God as He made Himself known  through the presence of an owl perched on a limb hanging over the fence.  There is a longer story that goes with that afternoon of revelation, but is was for me one of those earlier moments of coming to understand that the God whom I had experienced for a lifetime through the church was still present and revealing Himself through the creation instead of the brick and mortar of a building.  

What has grown strongly within me in these years of being immersed in the creation is that God is not experienced and His voice is not heard over there, or out yonder, but here in the present moment.  What I have also come to understand is that this has always been true regardless of where I have found myself.  It matters not whether we are standing on the beach watching a sunset, or at the end of an alley seeing the squalor of a homeless community.  God is present everywhere.  The Psalmist pointed us to this reality  long ago as he asked, "Where can I go from Your Spirit?  Or where can I flee from Your presence.?"  (Psalm 139:2)

Loved by the Father

When the prodigal son realized that He was loved anyway...regardless...despite how he had chosen to live...unconditionally....unreservedly...it surely must have been a moment of overwhelming gratitude.  More than just wasting his father's money, he had drug his father's honorable name through the mud and mire of degradation.  When people known to his father saw how far he had fallen, they either looked away in embarrassment for the father, or shook their heads in sorrow that their friend had such a son.    

It is not hard to imagine one of the father's friends saying to him, "If he were my son, I would let him go."  Of course, knowing the father as we do through the parable, we can well imagine him responding, "If he were your son, I would let him go, too, but he is not your son; he is my son."   I am grateful that the Father God has looked my way from time to time when it seemed even to me that He should cut me loose only to hear Him say, "I will not let him go, He is one of mine."  What a gift of grace it is to be loved by God.  

He loves as we are. He loves into who we are becoming.  His love has nothing to do with how we show our love for Him.  He loves us.  It is no wonder that so many of us rejoice in that word Paul wrote to  the church at Rome, "For I am convinced that neither death, nor life...nor things to come, nor powers..nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."  (Romans 8:38-39).  "Lord, does that include my sins?  Surely, my sins, Lord, surely my sins..."..........."No, my son, not even your sins...not even yours."

A New Window

I feel like a kid running down the stairs on Christmas morning as the sun pushes away the darkness.  A friend sent a gift that I retrieved from the post office yesterday and while I knew it was coming and while I knew what it was, there was still such excitement and anticipation.  Some would look at its nearly 3000 pages and declared it to be a "bookworm's delight."  It bears the title, "Prayer Book Offices" and says about itself in the introduction that it "has been designed for personal use in praying the Daily Office of the Church as is set forth in The Book of Common Prayer."   

It is filled with an orderly system of Scripture reading, prayers for morning, noon, and evening, orders for worship, and more than enough ritual and liturgy than I will likely read.  I receive it as a new means of creating order in my personal spiritual life.  I see it as a new window to be opened as I seek a deeper understanding of what it means to walk and live in Holy Presence.  Of course, it will provide none of these spiritual blessings if it simply sits on the book shelf as a book to admire and impress.   

Like any spiritual growth resource such as the sacred Word or a favorite devotional reading, it will do  little good if it simply collects dust on the shelf.  I remember an old gospel song from my childhood which had the words, "...get that dust off the Bible and redeem your poor soul."  Over the years I have been blessed with gifts of books from others who shared the journey with Christ.  Even as those gifts nurtured my soul so shall this new book which sits here before me on my desk.  It makes the road ahead all the more exciting!

An Unusual Suggestion

I am not a list keeper.  I have some folks in my life who worship the list and cannot figure how I can live without one.  Out of respect for their concern for me, I have tried from time to time.  Sometimes it is exciting to see one thing after another being marked off the list, but there have been more days when looking at it creates too much guilt.  Some folks are just more organized than this old preacher.  They are probably more productive, too.  I do not expect them to change and I know enough about myself to know I am not likely to become an avid "lister" of things on a list.    

One size never fits all.  It is surely true that some products come with a "one size fits all" label, but then it is seldom true.  There are exceptions to everything.  About this time of the year we start looking for what we should do with Lent.  Some folks race to what they always do.  Some folks figure the best thing to do for Lent is nothing.  Others race about the spiritual shelves looking for something which is going to lift them into a new stratosphere of spiritual growth.  The truth is most of us live better without the pressure of having to do something just because everyone else is doing something.  Most likely everyone is not doing anything.  

Whatever we decide to do, or not do, we should look no further than our own heart.  God knows our heart.  He does not require special things from us to make Him feel secure in our relationship.  I went to sleep the other day praying.  I trust He took some pleasure in the fact that I was pointed in the right direction when sleep overtook me.  My heart was pointed toward Him.  Maybe being pointed in His direction is enough for us to seek during this Lenten season.

The Slippery Slope

Being a part of a family puts an extra squeeze on the whole experience of fasting.  How does one who gathers with family at the table continue to engage in a spiritual fast without coming across as one whom Jesus described in that Sermon on the Mount teaching?  "And whenever you fast, do not look dismal...so as to show others that they are fasting." (Matthew 6:16).  It is not an easy thing to fast within family life without calling such attention to yourself that it looks like a definition of self-righteousness.    

Not showing up at family gathering moments does not seem to be the answer.  Our families are important.  Our presence with those with whom we share share such a special relationship is important and too many harmful things end up getting done in the name of religion without letting our empty plate on the table be one of them.  Sometimes we may have to simply say that a spiritual discipline which has both private and public ramifications may not be the right thing for a particular season of our life.  While this may sound like a bad compromise to some, it is always important to be sure that we do not bruise the soul of another by our intentions to nurture our own.    

The slippery slope is obvious.  Do we justify not attending worship in the same way if one member of our home objects to attending?  Do we make sure no one is watching when we pull our Bible off the shelf?  Do we allow someone's objections to keep us from sharing and expressing our faith in the public arena?  Even as we declare that the answer is "No," we also want to affirm with sensitivity our care for another.  Even as we seek to nurture our own soul, we must be sure we do not throw another soul into deep waters with a millstone around their neck.

Fasting in Lent

One of the disciplines to which the Lenten season calls us is fasting.  I must confess to having limited experience with this particular spiritual discipline, but enough to understand a little bit about it.  First of all, it must be pointed out that the purpose of a fast is spiritual.  Its purpose has nothing to do with weight loss.  If weight loss is what we are about in Lent, do not call is a fast.  Call it what it is and that is dieting.  One is about the body and the other is about the spirit.  

A second important thing to which consideration must be given is personal health.  If doing without food for an extended or unusual amount of time is putting personal health at risk, then fasting is is not a good idea.   If we are not acquainted with how our body is going to respond to a fast, it is better to start out by doing without a meal or two instead of launching out in some 40 day Jesus like fast.  The length of the fast is not as important as the reason we are entering into such a discipline.  While many good spiritual reasons might be offered for fasting, one very basic purpose should always be sharpening, or deepening our awareness of the presence of God in our life.  Some people might use the fasting discipline as a way of becoming more focused on a particular prayer concern such as the struggle of a sufferer, or a search for a way forward into what seems to be a new sense of God's unfolding plan.  

It is a good thing to keep it simple.  Fasting is not really a spiritual discipline which seeks to get some blessing from God as much as it is to seek only God's presence.  Finally, if the first attempts at fasting do not work out, there is no need to beat ourselves up about it.  God has proven Himself many times to be a God who longs more for a heart that seeks Him than one which takes pride in performance.  

Final Words

When the disciples heard Jesus talking about dying, they surely must have thought to themselves, "It cannot be!"  They had made no small sacrifice to follow this rabbi named Jesus.  They had left homes.  They had wives and, perhaps, children who were growing up.  They had left everything which had always been a part of their lives and it was incredulous for them to think that after such a short time, it was going to end.  Matthew records three specific times when Jesus told them what was going to happen in Jerusalem. "From that time on, Jesus began to show His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem and undergo great suffering...be killed, and on the third day be raised."  (Matthew 16:21, 17:22, 20:17).   

None of them believed it to be possible.  Peter actually pulled Jesus aside and with a rebuke in his voice said to Jesus, "God forbid it, Lord!  This must never happen to You."  (Matthew 16:22).  They had seen Jesus feed the five thousand, heal so many from diseases, watched him walk on water, but the boldness of this word filled with what was obviously impossible was too much to accept as a future reality.  It was a moment filled with more than just disbelieve over a certain moment, but a moment of declaring their unwillingness to accept the plan of God.  

 If we are honest with ourselves, we will admit there have been times when we were unwilling to accept the plan of God as it touched our lives.  There are things which are beyond our ability to accept as reasonable expressions of God working out a plan in our lives.  Our logical minds have questioned His judgement.  We have offered other more viable solutions and even made bargains with Him as a way of pressuring Him to see and do things our way.  Whenever it has happened, it is likely that we heard in some form or another the words Jesus spoke to Peter, "You are a stumbling block to Me; for you are setting your minds  not on divine things but on human things. (Matthew 16;23)

At the Cross

At the heart of the Apostle Paul's preaching is the word,  "...we preach Christ crucified."  (I Corinthians 1:23).  It is a hard word for preachers to preach and for those who listen to hear.  In many ways the message of "Christ crucified" is a counter culture word.  We live in an age that has convinced itself that if something is broken, we can fix it.  The message of the cross points to a brokenness which can only be fixed by external intervention. Preaching "Christ crucified" requires preaching about sin which is an outdated concept for so many who worship the psychological answers and solutions.   

To a larger degree the message of the church no longer has the power of influence as it did in earlier generations.   In an effort to draw more people under the umbrella of the church's influence, preachers are tempted to preach a "feel good" gospel which readily focuses on a loving Savior, but not necessarily a saving One.   People today seem to have an aversion to preaching that calls forth some kind of emotional response.  Sermons that teach or are entertaining have become more the norm.  

The problem is there is no way to go to the cross and see the horror of that day without our heart, the center of our emotions, being touched.  Preaching that overtly seeks an emotional response is regarded as manipulative.  Preaching trends today lean more toward "Christ, the loving Savior,"  or "Christ, the servant," or maybe, "anyone but Christ crucified."  Even as the resurrection message which is according to Scripture the central core of our faith is preached only on Easter so is it true that the only time the message of the cross might be proclaimed is on Good Friday.  What is often forgotten is that without Good Friday and the cross, there is no reason to show up with the crowds on Easter Sunday. 

The Uncomfortable Cross

When Jesus walked down the Mount of Transfiguration, He surely had the glory of the heavens resting upon His face.  As surely as His baptism culminated with an affirming vision which sent Him forth into His public ministry, so did the vision on the Mount send Him forth for the final part of the journey.  It was surely a moment which drew the attention of Jesus to the reality that His days were not only becoming fewer, but also harder.  While the cross was no surprise to Jesus, when He left the mountain it began to loom larger and larger before Him.    

Lent is a season for journeying with Jesus toward that looming cross.  While we would rather speak of the end of journey being the empty tomb, the tomb could only become a part of the narrative when the work of the cross was done.  Lent focuses on the cross.  I remember a preacher who preached a noon day service one Good Friday who said before his message, "Now I know today we remember Jesus dying on the cross, but instead of talking about such a bad thing, I am going to preach about the resurrection."  I wanted to stand and say, "Without the cross, there is no resurrection!"   

It is a strange thing the way the church wants to avoid the cross.  It does make people uncomfortable.  No one wants to confess their sins much less acknowledge them.  The Lenten invitation to repent is not something we want to do because it speaks to the fact that there is something wrong within us that can only be handled by what Jesus did on the cross. It all goes against the grain of our conviction that there is nothing we cannot handle or fix.  The gospel proclaims as a necessity the death of Jesus on the cross.  Sometimes it seems the church wants to water down that part of the story. 

Ash Wednesday, 2025

                 The Pause

 

There is a steadiness in my feet,

   a hard thudding upon the dry ground,

     relentless and unhindered they go 

       behind the One who goes just before,

         the One whose feet never hesitate

but go hard toward the waiting hill.

 

My eyes see but Him and not the hill 

    lest these feet should shirk the holy way

       of abandonment to the Father

         who waits beyond the growing darkness

             in silence until the work is done

and the deserted One cries His last. 

Seeing is knowing where I must go,

   but dare I take even one more step

     on this hard way of letting go all,

       or should this shuddering of my soul

        give me pause to count the cost again

before rough hands nail me to the cross?

The Good Stuff

When I was growing up in the Methodist Church of rural south Georgia, Lent was mostly mentioned, but not really observed.  We knew it was Lent when the coin folders were handed out on Sunday morning with a word about denying ourselves something like a coke or candy.  Each day during Lent a dime went in the coin folder and we brought them back to the church on Easter Sunday as a special mission offering.  The thought of putting ashes on our forehead as the Catholics did was just not proper Protestant behavior.   

I cannot say exactly when things began to change, but I do know by the time I got into my ministry years, Lent was a season which was more widely observed.  I remember a friend saying lightheartedly, "There is no reason to let the Catholics have all the good stuff."  There really is a lot of good stuff packed in the season of Lent.   It is unfortunate that our love affair with the spontaneous and our fear of ritual keep us from experiencing the deeper levels of meaning within the ashes of Ash Wednesday, the holy meal of Maundy Thursday, and the horror of the cross.  

Lent is also a season which calls us to be more attentive to our involvement in spiritual disciplines such as fasting, praying, reading the Word, and living generously and sacrificially.  When we truly respond to the invitation to observe a holy Lent, we find that Easter is like morning light bursting forth from the darkness and rushing over us as if a powerful wave of the Spirit has overwhelmed and immersed us in the power of the resurrection.  Lent prepares our heart for such a moment.  It would be a shame to settle for something less.

Preparation for the Journey

Lent is only hours away now.  Worship leaders have gathered the stored ashes from last year's Palm branches and are preparing themselves to mark foreheads with them as they speak the words, "Remember you are dust and to dust you shall return."  Lent begins this Wednesday with the coming of Ash Wednesday.  Ash Wednesday worship is not a joyous celebration of worship which causes everyone to leave feeling good.  It is a service of remembering and there is much to be remembered.   

It is a gathering where those who come are reminded of the fragile nature of life.  It is an uncomfortable moment for many.  Where is it that we voluntarily go to hear someone mark us with gray ashes and tell us we are going to die?  It is a reminder of our need for repentance.  Repentance is only done when we acknowledge the sins of our heart to God and ourselves and then confess them as one truly sorry for our misdoings. It is also a reminder of the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross.  The cross is not just a story of injustice and tragedy, but one which reminds us that divine forgiveness requires an atoning sacrifice and the heartbreak of God.  It is not a moment to be taken lightly.   

A Word from Luke 9:51 is often read as a verse which marks the beginning of the final journey of Jesus to Jerusalem and the cross.  "When the days drew near for Him to be taken up, He set His face to go to Jerusalem."  Jesus did not go to Jerusalem and then something happened which was beyond His control.  He knew what was waiting for Him in the Holy City and with intentionality born out of obedience to the Father's will, He chose to go.  It may have been evil which put Him on the cross, but it was love that caused Him to put His life in the hands of those who meant evil and not good for Him.  As Jesus journeyed in those days with the cross upon His heart, so should we journey with Him in this holy season of Lent.

A Culture of Confirmation

On a recent trip to a bookstore, a book entitled "The Essential Tozer Collection" showed up at eye level and a voice from within said, "This is the one."  A. W. Tozer was a prominent self educated theologian and preacher who died in 1963.  One of the first things which caught my attention was something he wrote in his discussion about justification.  "The whole transaction of religious conversion has been made mechanical and spiritless.  Faith may now be exercised without a jar to the moral life and without embarrassment to the Adamic ego.  Christ may be received without creating any special love for Him..." 

It was a word which set me to thinking and I ended up writing in the margins, "We live in a culture of confirmation instead of salvation."  One of the benefits of retirement is that it has enabled me to listen to a lot of preachers.  One of the things glaringly obvious over these fifteen years is something I had noted for a much longer time.  The church offers a lot of talk about Jesus, but seldom invites people to know Jesus.  Our young are becoming part of the church culture by learning about Jesus in Confirmation groups without really choosing Jesus out of a spiritual hunger in their hearts.  It is as if salvation is of the mind and not the heart.  Too many of us preachers preach not to the heart but to the mind out of the false assumption that everyone who hears the sermon is in a heartfelt relationship with Jesus.   

If this thinking of mine has any merit, it would help us understand why the cherished mainline churches of our childhood are sliding toward extinction.  We like to say the decline is about the graying of our society, or the lack of interest younger generations have in organized religion and maybe there is a measure of truth to such observations, but could it not be that the church has become too content in teaching about Jesus?  Could it be that no one is being asked to give their heart to Jesus?  Could it be that confirmation is a poor substitute for a heart strangely warmed in conversion?

The Greater Miracle

All four of the gospel writers tell the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand.  The first three gospels (known as the Synoptic Gospels) tell it much the same.  John personalizes the event by speaking of specific disciples instead of the disciples in general.  An interesting feature of the first three is the way the disciples wanted to send the people away.  It was the only sensible thing to do in light of the great need of the crowd and the lack of anything to eat.  (Matthew 14:15).   

What Jesus said to their pragmatic thinking must have blown their minds.  "They need not go away; you give them something to eat." (Matthew 14:16). They had nothing except five loaves and two fish which was a paltry amount to feed so many.  Why it would not have even been enough to feed the twelve disciples much less five thousand people!  When Jesus responded to them by saying, "Bring them (the loaves and fish) to me," (Matthew 14:18) He says an important Word we often do not want to hear.  Basically, He told the disciples two things.  First, you do something about the need you see.  Secondly, make available what you have and it will be enough.  

What is more frightening to us?  It is one thing to see folks in need and another to personally get involved.  As frightening as that possibility is to us, the second is even worse.  Jesus wants us to give not just part of what we have, but all of what we have even it is what seems to be such a small amount.  It is the stuff of miracles.  The first miracle might be meeting an impossible need, but the greater miracle might be you and me turning loose of our stuff.