A Word for the Day

When things are in short supply, they become more valuable.  If this is true, then it makes sense that living into old age makes the years more precious.  What once seemed like something which would never end becomes like a book being read.  The pages toward the back cover are much fewer than those toward the front cover.  Perhaps, such thoughts are not just the thoughts of a man who has lived into his seventies, but also the reflections precipitated by the last day of the calendar year.   

One of the things which greeted me with the gray skies of this last day of the year was a most familiar song, "Amazing Grace."   One of the verses has the words, " 'tis grace hath brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home."  Seems appropriate.  Feels like a Word from the Father in heaven who provides all of us with our days. Regardless of what some might think, I will choose to regard it as such.  A Word from God for this day.  

We sometimes think it is our determination and effort, our hard work, or our good luck which gets us from one day to the next, but the song has it right.  Life is about grace.  No single day is lived without a goodly portion of it being poured out upon us.  As we count our blessings on this last day of the year and see all the things we can hold in our hands, let us not forget the one invisible gift of God which has sustained us and will be sufficient for all the journey including the very end of it that brings us Home.

Life is Messy

When the year started, we had no idea about the things that were to come.  Looking back is to see this panorama of our personal life which includes many expected things, but most likely, a long list of things which were unplanned, more things like surprises, and more than a few things we would have chosen not to experience had there been such an option.  Life is messy and unpredictable.  Anyone who lives with the idea of being in charge, or in control of what is ahead is living inside an illusion that will one day come crashing down upon them.    

The Biblical narratives tell us such stories.  Anyone who reads the book of Genesis is surely reminded of the messy nature of life as well as how unpredictable it can be.  But, the thread that holds the family story together is the faithfulness of God.  He is ever present.  He is always taking them from one moment in their journey to another.  He never forsakes them to their own devices no matter how much trouble they bring upon their own heads.    

And, as we look back over the months of this past year, or the bigger picture of our life, we see this reality of God's faithfulness.  Most of us have come to the place many times of thinking that if we were God, we would have given up on the one we see in the mirror many times.  But, of course, He does not.  With a love that enabled Him to send His Son to Bethlehem and Golgotha, He loves us.  With a love like the father of the prodigal son, He is always at the gate of Home looking for us when we decide to wonder off into a place not in keeping with His purposes for us.  Whatever it is that is out there we will always be surrounded with His faithfulness and love and with such knowledge, we do dare to step into the messy future which awaits us.   

Cow Watching

It is not an uncommon moment around here to watch the cows.  Of the ten cows that graze in the pasture, one is a steer born about a year ago.  I call him Freezer, not out of disrespect, but as a way of reminding myself that his purpose is to help sustain life.  After a couple of years in the pasture, he becomes our primary source of meat for the next year.  The other cows sustain life by providing more calves, but this one sustains life as he becomes a source of food that is homegrown here on the farm.    

As I watched today the words sustain life really got hung up in my mind.  I found myself thinking about the early words of Genesis as it speaks of men and women being created with the same purpose.  As those who co-create with God, we find purpose in sustaining continued life.  But, it is not just in the biological act that we sustain life, but in the living and caring for those who come after us.  As parents we are given the divine purpose of living before and with our children in a way that at its core sustains their lives.   Two decades of our living is investing in sustaining life.   

But, in an even greater sense we are meant to live connected to the creation in such a way that our living helps sustain the life of the creation as well.  The creation is not something provided for us to use to the point of exhaustion, but to use responsibly and carefully.  Actually, the creation provides clues for us about right living, but we are usually moving at a pace that makes it impossible to see and hear what is being shouted out to us by everything around us.  In the midst of the creation is life that gives order, purpose, and life to us and even as it sustains us, so are we meant to live in such a way that the life of the creation is sustained by our care of it.    

Morning in the Graveyard

Some years ago the local cemetery committee needed a volunteer caretaker so I decided to do it since my father-in-law had served some years ago.  It is not a big thing.  It mostly is about making sure the upkeep gets done, pay any bills, and sell plots to those who want to buy them.  This morning first thing I went up to the cemetery in response to a call from someone ready to buy a plot.  When I pulled up, there was a woman sitting beside the graves of her parents.  As I spoke identifying myself, I noticed the marker which told me her mom had died recently which explained her presence and her early morning tears.    

It reminded me of a number of things.  First, it spoke of a reality we all know, but often put aside.  Christmas can be a rough time for those who have lost loved ones during this season.  And, secondly, it gave me a moment of reflecting on my own mortality.  It is not that I constantly am thinking about not being here, but as the years start adding up, it is obvious that I have been here more years than I will be here.   Time is precious.  It is the most precious commodity we possess and we tend to use it up like it is some inexhaustible resource.    

But, the most lasting thing I carried away from the early morning visit to the graveyard was a hymn written by Isaac Watts.  "O  God, our help in ages past, our hope for years to come, our shelter from the stormy blast, and our eternal home," is the first verse, but the one I found myself mostly singing quietly in my spirit was the 5th verse which says, "Time, like an ever rolling stream, bears all who breathe away, they fly forgotten, as a dream dies at the opening day."  While it may be a bit much for some, Watts ended with those words of triumph as he wrote, "O God, our help in ages past, our hope for years to come, be thou our guide while life shall last, and our eternal home."   

Reflection

The days which announce the end of a calendar year bring with them moments of reflection.  Perhaps, it is different in heaven, but here on earth, a printed calendar often shapes what we do and how we do it.  This reflection at the end of December and the first of January has always expressed itself in the making of resolutions.  Making resolutions is not something which our religion dictates that we should be about, it is just something we have at different times in different degrees involved ourselves.  And, of course,  most resolutions are made today and gone tomorrow.   

Reflection takes us to a different level.  It is more of a religious experience in that we are required to give some serious thought to how we have been living with ourselves, one another, and our Creator. When this happens in a serious and thoughtful manner, it usually takes us to some form of repentance.  This repentance may not be expressed in traditional religious terms, but it involves sorrow and a desire to turn to a different way.  Particularly, is this true when we use these days to consider our spiritual lives.    

The easy response to such spiritual reflection is to decide to read another chapter of the Bible every day, or to pray five more minutes, or to do something which offers some hope of improving our spiritual lives.  And while these things are important, what really needs reflection is not the doing part of our lives, but the being part.  Who is it that we are becoming in the eyes of God?  What kind of spirit guides us in our walk with Him and our living with others?  Who is that person we see in the mirror each morning?   Where are we and where is He calling us to go?   Where are we willing to go?  Resolutions take us into the shallow water, but reflection may get us out in waters that are over our heads.

Thoughts

The Sundays between the celebration of Christmas and the day of Epiphany have always seemed to be an awkward moment for the church.   In actuality the season of Christmas begins on Christmas Day and continues until that day of remembering the journey of the wise men from the east.  The problem for the church and its people is that all the Christmas energy is spent before Christmas arrives.  Unlike Easter when no self respecting church person would sing Easter songs until Easter Sunday, by the first Sunday of Christmas which is the Sunday after Christmas Day all the Christmas hymns have been sung to the point of exhaustion.      

Not only is the church worn out with the Christmas music, but many preachers have put Jesus in the manger several times in sermons.  So, as Christmas Day passes and the season marked Christmas begins, no one knows exactly what to do.  Strangely enough a Christmas sermon seems out of place and everyone feels strange if a Christmas hymn is announced as one to sing.  Instead of focusing on the message the Christian calendar is proclaiming, the church is mostly ready to move on to whatever is next.    

Suggesting that all this could be avoided by observing Advent might be relevant, but no one really wants to do this when the world is declaring the December days of Advent to be the Christmas season.  Maybe it is just one of those problems which cannot be fixed.  Of course, it is not really a problem for ninety-nine out of one hundred people who enter the doors of the church.  Perhaps, the only reasonable thing to do is to continue with the awkwardness of a season that is a season in name only.  Maybe the important thing is that Christmas is celebrated to the point of being worn out with it.  Few of us really give it any thought as we wait for the day of the arrival of the wise men even though the great majority of us figure there is no need to wait as they have already arrived.   

Thresholds

The calendar is a constant reminder in these days of days ending and days beginning.  There are days that are past and there are days still to come.  In these waning days of December with the winter solstice only a few days behind us, there is a sense of standing in what might be called in-between times, or according to the ancient strand of Celtic spirituality, a threshold moment.   While we might make big productions about changes that take us from one thing to another, the truth is we are constantly standing in one threshold or another.     

The word threshold brings to mind an image of a door.  A door is both an entrance and an exit.  We can come to the door and stand there with one foot in what is behind and one in what is ahead, but staying there for very long is impossible.  At some point we have to move.  In-between moments come and go, but they are not permanent fixtures in our life.   Sometimes it is hard to embrace the reality that we cannot live in both worlds.  

We may not want to turn lose of what is behind us, but we cannot take hold of what is ahead of us unless we let go of what is past.  And what is also true is that many of these threshold moments are not really moments of our own choosing.  Life changing events such as the loss of someone we love, or divorce, or the birth of children, or a new job, or some words from a doctor can all thrust us from where we are to where we are going.  We may stand still in a state of pause, but we are not created to live in such a state.  God is One who is always leading us forward and to go where He is leading means realizing that each step is a threshold moment as we decide about continuing the journey.   

The Face of God

There are many memories which are etched firmly in that part of us which stores memories.  When I start going through those which are filed away, there are two which are always up front and, hopefully, will never be erased by the work old age can sometimes do.  Both involve the first time I looked in the faces my two daughters.  One I saw for the first time through a hospital nursery window facing the hall and the other was handed to me by a nurse as she was being taken to her mother.  As any of us who are parents will agree, there is no moment like seeing your child for the first time.     

And, so it must have been for that young couple in Bethlehem so long ago.  It is likely that Joseph was the midwife and, therefore, caught the first glimpse of the Christ child before he was handed to Mary.  In the Celtic stream of spirituality it was believed that to look into the face of a newly born child was to look into the face of God.  And when the child was born, the midwife would drop three drops of water on the infant's head as a ritual invoking the Trinity.  If any parents looked into the face of God as they looked at their newborn child, it was surely Joseph and Mary.     

While He would later speak of seeing Him and seeing the Father, He, of course, was calling us to see more than the physical attributes of His manhood, but to see those invisible things about Him which can only be seen through the eyes of faith, the eyes of wonder, and the expectant eyes of hope.  Where He walked, God walked.  Where His presence was seen, so was seen the presence of God.  Such is the nature of the reality that in Him, God became flesh for us.  Mary and Joseph saw that first morning and the rest of us continue to see as we walk the road with Him toward Home.

A Glorious Morning

It was indeed a glorious morning, that first morning when the Holy Son breathed His first breath of this earth's air.  Everything was the same, but everything was different.  The Light that had the power to put life into creation and the Light that had the power to break any deep darkness broke out in glorious splendor from that humble animal stable.  The Invisible now Visible.  God among us on that morning in a new and different way.   

It was a morning that filled heaven with the sounds of angels singing and offering praise to God, a morning when ordinary folks like shepherds were awaken to new divine possibilities, and a morning to be remembered for all the generations.  Though each morning bears the imprint of the holy, this morning so long ago was pouring from the seams with holy presence.  Never has there been a moment like it, nor will there ever be one to come.   

It was a morning unlike any morning.  Ask Mary who held the child and pondered what God had done.  Ask Joseph who looked back grateful he had awaken from a dream with a change of heart and attitude.  Ask the men from the east who came as the first gift bearers in honor of the child.  Ask the millions of men and women who have knelt in awe at the wooden trough serving as a cradle and at the foot of the wooden cross where the child become a man died.  Ask anyone who walks with this Son of Bethlehem even today.  All declare the message of a changed life, an end to the darkness, and a hope for life to come.  Praise be to the Father for His goodness, praise be to the Son for His willingness to give life, and praise to the Spirit for drawing us to Him.

The Story

The traditional story of the birth of Jesus does not follow the details of the Biblical account, but then, such is not really necessary.  According to the traditional story enacted in the roadside nativity scenes, tonight is the night remembered as the time of travel.  At first glance it would seem that the nativity couple arrived in Bethlehem in the evening after dark and the moment of birth came rather quickly.  Or, perhaps, it was sometime after midnight and before the next sunrise.  The Word simply says, "While they were there, the time came..."  (Luke 2:6)    

It is possible that the birth of Jesus came after Joseph and Mary waited for several days, or longer, there in  Bethlehem.  The important thing to be remembered is that the Christ child was born according to the divine plan revealed long centuries before that moment.   Through prophetic utterance the coming of the Holy One and the place of His birth was proclaimed.  Everything about it was divinely planned, or as the Apostle Paul wrote to the Galatians, "But when the fullness of time had come, God sent His Son, born of a woman..."  (Galatians 4:4)     

There is much to celebrate on this night.  It may not be the exact day of the year that Jesus was born long ago in Bethlehem, but the actual date is not as important as the fact of it happening.  Christ was born.  He came out of love to live among us, to taste fully the human experience, and to point us toward the way of living fully and completely as a child of God.  He came not just to create a story for this night, but to live and die for each one of us on the cross.  Let no one think the cross was any less intentional than the birth.  It was for the cross and the empty tomb the child was born to a manger.  

Slow Miracles

Miracles do not always happen at the snap of a finger.  Sometimes they do, but not always.   There were ten leper who had to walk a piece before they saw a miracle of healing taking place in their lives.  Naaman had to go to some dirty river and wash himself before he saw his miracle.  Another fellow had to go wash the mud out of his eyes.  And, then there was the thief on the cross who had to finish dying before the great miracle of his life happened.   It would seem that God is not in the hurry that we sometimes find ourselves.   

But, the greatest miracle recorded in Scripture and the greatest miracle which has ever touched the earth is the one which took the womb of a woman, two hearts bent on being obedient to holy leading, a God who was willing to risk everything on the likes of you and me, and nine months.  Matthew and Luke speak of this holy miracle in narrative form while the gospel writer John simply wrote, "And the Word became flesh and lived among us..."  (John 1:14)   When Jesus came forth that night in Bethlehem the greatest miracle of every miracle took place.     

When God acts it is not always on our time schedule.  It would seem that we would learn this early in our faith journey, but far into it we are still telling God how He needs to be in a hurry.  Those who see and know the miracles of God must not only be faithful souls, but patient ones.  In the Celtic spirituality tradition an often used word is the word "unfolding."  It is a word which creates an image of how we can expect God to work among us and make Himself known in our midst.  What God is about to do is always unfolding before us, but it often takes eyes that see what cannot be seen to comprehend Who and what is out there right in front of us.  

The Nativity Journeys

The Christmas story as told in the Scriptures is a story of journeys.  Of course, the most obvious one is the one Mary and Joseph took as they traveled from Nazareth to Bethlehem.  We have seen that journey enacted a thousand times in nativity scene events.  There is also the journey of the shepherds from the fields to the village where Jesus was born.  It was a short journey compared to the one traveled by the men from the east who followed the star.  The mostly forgotten journeys are the ones which took the new family to Egypt as refugees and then later back home when the threatening Herod was dead.   

There was one other journey which defies depiction.  It is in some ways the shortest and, yet, the longest.  It is the one set forth in John's gospel with the words, "And the Word became flesh and lived among us..."  (John 1:14)  The Apostle Paul elaborated on those few words when he wrote his letter to the Philippians.  "...though He was in the form of God, (He) did not count equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness..."(Philippians 2:6-7)     

It could be said that Jesus came from heaven to earth, from the invisible realm into the visible one as quick as conception.  For nine months He remained invisible in the womb before being pushed out into the hay of a stable in Bethlehem.  As surely as is the journey of any baby from the invisible to the visible is a great wonder, so it was for Him as well.  But, mostly it was up to his parents to experience the awe and wonder at the birth of a son who had been promised to them and to the world.  To them somewhere in the midst of their journey a Savior was born in their lives.  It is the same for us on our journey.  

The Three

From Nazareth

   to Bethlehem

     went the three, 

        mother Mary,

      young Joseph,

child within.

Wanders,

   on the road 

     one walking,

       one riding,  

     one carried

safe within.

Came the Three

    on the road,

      Holy God,

        Blessed Son,

      Wind and Fire,

 all within. 

The Land of Wonder

 The Mystery

     rekindled

       memories

of another time,

    another place,

       so long ago,

playing barefoot,

    bare chested,

        running free,

on the dirt, 

    in the air,

      land of wonder.  

The new land,

    not long ago,

       different,

restrictive leather,

    binding buttons,

       always going,

in a hurry,

    to somewhere

       wandering,

like a soul

   lost and alone,

      empty of wonder.

Ahead the light

   beckons

     a return

to the time 

   of simply being

      one created,

a part of all

   that now is

     and will be,

a child of light

   seeing once again

      the land of wonder.

       

The Unending Gift

Maybe it is the season.  Maybe I have been receiving some gifts of a different kind in these recent days. Whatever the case, my awareness of being thankful for the blessing provided in the unexpected gifts has overflowed.  The gifts came wrapped as two old friends.  They are old friends not just because they are old like me, but because our friendship goes back a long way.  The first was a guy who has faithfully prayed for me since I served as his pastor in my first church.  The second was someone I have known since we were teenagers connecting through ham radio.  Hearing their voices again in these days was a blessing akin to something heavenly.    

I remember that Jesus had friends.  Lazarus, of course, is the most notable one.  Surely, the disciples became more to Jesus than just people to be mentored.  His care for them obviously went far beyond the boundaries of that single relationship.  And, then, there is that moment of teaching when He spoke of them as friends in such a way as to draw all of us who follow Him into the net He was casting with His love and mercy.  "I do not call you servants any longer....but I have called you friends..."  (John 15:15)     

Not all our gifts during this Christmas season will come wrapped in festive paper and colorful ribbon.  Perhaps, the best are those wrapped tightly within the wrappings of the friendships which have brought us untold blessings in days past and continue to bless even in the present day when the separation of distance and years is broken by the memories that linger in the inner part of our life.  It is truly amazing how God can bring people into our lives who are important to our present moment and how the memory of their gifts gifts once more.   

Troubling Things

There are times when we wish we could un-read what we have read, un-think what we have started thinking, and do over what we did.  More than once in these recent years have such feelings surfaced from within to flood my conscious mind.  Troubling things.  Challenging things.  Throughout this faith journey the church has preached this doctrine of being conceived in sin without mentioning that we bear the imprint of the holy from the moment of conception forward.  The Word tells us that marriage is a relationship between a man and a woman, but now the church's message is different due to cultural pressures.  And, even though the church has always held up that commandment about not killing, it has also sanctioned killing under certain circumstances.    

Troubling.  How do we undo thinking we have done about things which for so long never seem to require much thinking at all.  So many of us grew up inside a church culture that we never really were allowed to question, or perhaps, a more accurate thing to say is that we never thought to question which puts the responsibility for what we think upon ourselves instead of someone else.  And, of course, some would say there is nothing which needs to be re-thought.  Something that has stood for centuries, or which cannot pass the culture test does not need to be thought about again.     

I often find myself remembering an old Episcopal friend in such moments.  A priest in that church and a valued friend for a number of years, Ron often said that if we read between the lines of what Jesus said, we would hear Him saying, "Go figure."  As the years have slipped along, I have come to appreciate more and more what my friend had to say in those days of our being together.  Those who follow Jesus must take both heart and mind, or something important and necessary has been left behind in the road.

Stirrings of the Holy

One of the great Old Testament stories takes place as Moses draws aside from being a shepherd so that he can see the bush that was burning, but was not consumed.  Before Moses got too close the Lord spoke saying, "Come no closer!  Remove your sandals from your feet, for the place on which you are standing is holy ground."  (Exodus 3:5)  A little later after all the plagues had run their course and the people had come to Mt. Sinai, the Lord spoke again to prepare Moses for what was to come by saying, "..the whole earth is mine..."  (Exodus 19:5).  Mt. Sinai, the burning bush, everything in between, and everything all around bore the imprint of the Creator, and therefore, it all was holy ground.     

Barefooted we would be all the time if we took off our shoes when we walked on holy ground for all the ground beneath our feet is holy.  What is true is that the whispers of holiness fill every stirring of the creation.  Every living creature, every growing thing, every rock and stream, every thing in the air and above the air is holy for it all speaks of the handiwork of God.   

Our inability to sense these holy stirrings all around us speak of our separation from the life we were created to live.  We were not brought into this created order to live out of sync with it, to live without an awareness of the holy, or to be so filled with hurry that there is no time for stillness.  It is no wonder that there is an unsatisfied longing within us which often seems like we are constantly reaching for something which floats in the air just beyond our grasp.  We were meant to live with an awareness that everything around us is stirring with the essence of the holy for from what is holy we came, in the midst of what is holy we journey, and to what is holy we are going.  

Bumps in the Road

When retirement came and moving to the farm became a reality, one of the things which changed was the road.  In the urban areas where I mostly lived, all the roads were streets or avenues and they were always paved.   Getting to the farm means leaving the paved highway for a road which is really little more than a two lane dirt road.  Actually, it is an easement road meaning that the farm is landlocked and the folks who owned the land between us and the highway have to provide access.  At times that two lane dirt road gets a little bumpy and I am tempted to put up a sign which would read, "Life has a lot of bumps in the road!"    

Perhaps, the sign really is not necessary.  Anyone who has lived a spell knows there are always bumps ahead.  Sometimes it is more than a bump which jars, but a bump which literally tosses you in the ditch.  The trouble is we get lulled into thinking that the road ahead is not only like a freshly paved highway, but it is supposed to be.  While no one should be surprised by the bumps, rough places, and even potholes, we end up hitting them and start fussing, or whining, or crying, "Unfair!"   

Of course, life is not about being fair.  Neither is it about making us feel good.  Life brings with it fair skies and cloudy days.  It brings laughter and tears.  Life does not provide guarantees of smooth rides.  To read the Word of God is to be reminded again and again of this reality.  In the Sermon on the Mount we hear Jesus saying, "...He (the Father in Heaven) makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteousness and on the unrighteous."  (Matthew 5:45)   There is no need to worry about those bumps in the road just as there is no reason to be surprised that they are out there ahead of us.  

Wonder and Epiphany

Getting up with all the things which are going to be demanded of us in the day is a prescription for a day somewhere between mediocre and horrible.  And, then before breakfast throw in the faces of the difficult people expected to be in your path and crawling back into bed seems like the smart thing.  When we get too focused on the expected visible external pressures and stresses of the day, we can hardly expect to experience holy epiphanies and moments of sheer wonder.     

What might be a better choice is found in a moment in the morning for sitting in the presence of the Holy One who blesses us with sleep and then blesses us again by waking us up as the sun begins to light the sky.  While we may have our own spiritual routine for those moments with God, we can also venture into some new territory by offering ourselves to Him in a different way.  Instead of boring Him daily with the details of those things we dread, we might try asking Him to bring some awe and wonder in our daily experiences by bringing people into our lives who will bring blessings to us as well as some others whom God can bless through us.     

But, to enter into such a different spiritual discipline could be a dangerous thing.  We might find ourselves being hindered as we seek to stay on a time schedule because He brings into our routine interruptions which He plans to use to answer our prayers.  We will have to be careful that we do not show a lack of patience and grace when He is working to provide for us moments which we will count at the end of day as moments of sheer wonder and holy epiphany.  

The Real Silence

When the lights are turned off, the television has blared its last voice, and the computer screen has finally gone to sleep, we close our eyes and hope that sleep is only a blink or more away.  In those moments before all the internal switches are turned to the off position, we are often aware of the silence of the place where we live.  Everything seems quiet.  Silent at last.  But, not really.  It takes a power outage in the darkness to turn off the ever hummings that are so much a part of our lives, we do not hear them.  In that moment we truly hear the sounds of silence and it is a sound amplified by the deepened darkness created by the absence of all the digital lights that burn in all the rooms.    

Even as real silence is hard to find in our external world, it is hard to hear in our inner being.  It seems that there is always something humming within us which keeps us from knowing what it is to sit in silence in our lives.  Distractions abound when we seek to separate ourselves from them.  Immediately, they begin to cry loudly for attention and it is only with a great effort that we are able to turn away from them so we can go back into the empty silence.   

Actually, some wonder why entering the silence is something to be sought.  At every point it our noisy society, we are caused to avoid the silence.  To avoid the silence is to avoid knowing ourselves and knowing what it means to truly walk with the One who created us.  The place of His dwelling is in our hearts.  It is not a noisy place, but a place where a holy voice can be heard again and again.  And while His voice can be overpowering, it is often the quiet voice that is only heard by those who discipline themselves to walk in the still silence which is always all around us and within us.   

The Place of Stillness

 At a moment when Elijah should have been basking in the victory on Mt. Carmel (I Kings 18:20 ff.), he is found hanging out in fear at the mouth of a cave on Mt. Horeb.  He was told by the Lord, "Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by."  (I Kings 19:11).  There was the sound of a great wind.  There was the sound of rocks breaking.  And, finally there was a great crackling fire. Each of these moments filled the air with a sound of its own.  And in between each sound so overwhelming to the ears was silence.  Finally, there came that moment of what is described as sheer silence and in that sound, the voice of the Lord was heard.      

In that moment when the earth was stilled in silence, the Lord spoke.  Such can be expected to happen in our lives.  If we walk into the stillness long enough, it will begin to grow in us.  Instead of seeking the stillness, it will  be with us as we go.  Such is always true for those who learn to listen for the voice of the Lord in the stillness of silence.  There is something about putting ourselves in the midst of stillness that opens our inner being to a holy silence in which the voice of the Spirit is heard.    

While we may do things to create this external and inner stillness, in reality it can only be known as a gift of grace from the Creator.  All around us the stillness exists.  It is present in the loud sounds that bombard us.  It is is present in the darkness which threatens us.  It is present in the uncertainty that baffles us.  Though nothing may seem to be filled with the silence of stillness, it is always out there for those of us who learn to move toward it despite the circumstances and then allow it to grow in our hearts, enabling us to hear that never silenced holy Voice..       

The Larger Book

The ninth century Celtic theologian, Scotus Eriugena, taught there were two sacred books.  One was the holy scripture which he called the little book and the second was the creation which is called the larger book.  It is easy enough to read the little book, but the larger book of creation might require a few reading lessons.  Most of us have difficulty seeing what seems to be hidden, or what our eyes and ears tell us cannot be seen or heard.  Learning to read what the eyes cannot see at first glance is something which requires both a willingness to enter the silence and a heart that is open to what has previously been invisible.    

To consider this second book as being a sacred book put in place for us by the Spirit seems like a far stretch for many.  To many the creation is not about sacred truths being revealed and spoken, but about the science and logic.  And, of course, trees have no voice and the earth and all that is a part of it have been put here to serve and provide for the survival of humankind.  With such a limited view of all that is around us it is easy to understand how some can look a life time and never really experience holy presence in the created world which surrounds them.     

The little book teaches that the earth belongs to the Lord.  Everything in it bears His imprint.  Everything He created He called good, some of it very good.  In the letter to the Roman Christians, the Word says, "Ever since the creation of the world His eternal power and divine nature, invisible though they are, have been seen and understood and seen through the things He has made..."   (Romans 1:20)  The creation is not here simply to provide for those of us who walk in it, or to create beautiful sunsets, but also to provide for us a means through which we can encounter the One who created it.  

The Second Book

John Wesley, the father of Methodism, spoke of himself as being a man of one book.  Thus, he spoke of the supreme importance of the Holy Scripture in his life.  As one ordained to preach within the Methodist Church, I, too, have often thought of myself as a man of one book.  This is not to say I have not read other books, or that other books have not had any influence on my life, but simply to say that of all books this one is the most important in that it holds within it the inspired Word of God.  Recently, I have begun to think of myself as a man with another book.     

I started reading this second book without realizing I was reading it as I wandered around on the farm midst an expansive Creation.  Things started stirring within me that I was slow to grasp.  Then I read something within the Celtic spiritual tradition from a ninth century Celtic theologian named Scotus Eriugena.  In his book, Sacred Earth Sacred Soul,"  John Philip Newell wrote, "Eriugena teaches that there are two books through which God is speaking.  The first is the small book; physically little, this is the book of Holy Scripture.  The second is the big book, the living text of universe...We need to read both books."     

As I read the teaching of Eriugena, I began to realize I had been reading from the second book which is another way of saying that God had been speaking and revealing His presence through the creation which is all around me.  As surely as reading the written Word can be life changing, so can paying attention to the creation which is all around us.  What I have learned is that there are things not seen by the eyes and not heard by the ears which can be seen and heard as we learn to pay attention to reality of holy presence surrounding us in the visible handiwork of the Creator.  

Who Am I?

A lot of changes take place in the course of our life.  Some are subtle and we hardly are aware that one moment is different from the one before it.  Others come to us like earthquakes shaking us and throwing us on the ground in some new form.  Retirement has proven to be a little bit of both.  There are moments when suddenly there is an awareness of gentle wind, but there is no awareness of how long it has been blowing.  On other days it seems like a different person is walking in shoes that no longer fit.     

All along the way we are told change is certain, but most of us hang onto the idea that life will always be the same,  that nothing will change what we believe deeply about our faith, and that we will be who we have always been.  Sometimes I find myself wondering who I am.  In days past the question was easily defined as I was constantly being called "preacher," or "Rev Bill," or something of that nature.  Nowadays it no longer fits.  I define myself as farmer since some of that is done around here, but when I see a neighbor pull up in the field next door to combine a hundred acres of cotton, the name simply does not wear very well.     

Who am I?  It is the question of our beginning.  Maybe it also the question of our ending.  Maybe the answer is not found in what we do, but who we are, not what titles we wear, but who we become.  Becoming is not an easy thing as it is something which stretches always out there ahead of us.  It may even be true that in the end we finally become the one we were created to be which is one content to be in the hands of the One who first pushed us forward and toward our Home.  

Four Gospels

Each one of the four gospels is different.  Certainly, there are many parallel passages, but overall each one is different.  Matthew records the Sermon on the Mount.  None of us would want to miss that sermon.  Mark is in a hurry and also uses the fewest words which is why it is often recommended to someone wanting to begin reading the gospels.  Luke gives us a birth story that no one else figured needed to be told.  And, John leaves us with unfinished stories and images lingering in the air.    

Everyone has their favorite.  For some reason the gospel of John has always had more magnetic power than the others.  As a boy learning to read the Word, I was captured by the stories in the earlier chapters.  When I started preaching, those stories were so often the springboard for sermons.  And now as one whose boyhood is a distant memory, it is the images and the subtle leading of words which cause me to go back to it again and again.    

More than the others it seems that John invites us to read and to "go figure."  Personally, t seems that such speaks of the spirit of Jesus.  When asked questions that could have been answered with an either-or answer, He sent people away scratching their heads and searching their souls.  I have done a lot of both over the years,  While I am aware I have more understanding than I did when I started, the journey will never be completed on this side of the River.

Helpers

When I started writing this blog back in 2008, it never occurred to me to write over three hundred blog postings in a year.  Back then five or six a month was more than enough.  But, as is always the case, things change.  Retirement came.  Standing behind the pulpit was no longer an option.  I suppose some might say the Lord took away the preaching ministry and set me forth on this blogging ministry.  It has provided me a means of being faithful to the call placed on my life when I was a teenager ready to graduate high school.  And, it has also kept me thinking which is important in any season of our life.    

In the beginning it seemed inconceivable to write daily, but as this year comes to a conclusion it will be the fifth year of writing more than 300 within the span of a year.  Writing that many means that a few have possibly been good, a few more have been average, and a great many do not need to be read but one time.  What I have recognized is that the name given to the blog long years ago has proved to be a good one.  More and more I am understanding that nothing about life is about getting there, but instead, everything is about the going.    

Some days I am tempted to quit.  In those moments I think of the people who have told me they bear with me each day in the reading of what I have written.  These folks I have come to think of us as my new congregation.  There was a time when it seemed that I would write and cast what was written out in the wind, but now I have come to a place of seeing the faces of those who read and often find some way to offer a word of encouragement.  When I write, I now see faces from the past and the present and I am indebted to each for being helpers in my going forward.  

The Different Road

Some folks take journeys to places regarded as sacred.  The Holy Land is high on the list of places many Christians want to visit.  Others might choose something a little closer to home like a monastery, or a mountain retreat center where some celebrity spiritual leader is teaching.  And, of course, there are many folks who simply find themselves living out their lives in the places where they seem to be put and there they experience the years as a journey of the heart.   

While I did not recognize it in the beginning, retirement not only opened the door to a different way of life, but it sent me forth on a spiritual journey which has taken me in a direction I could never have anticipated.  What I must also confess is that I had no idea where I was going when I set out and neither am I really sure where I am going now that I am well on my way in this part of the journey God has called me to walk.  More and more there is growing within me an awareness that God calls us to go to know not where.   

It was surely that way with Abraham, that great sojourner in Biblical history.  It has also been that way with many of the saints who went from cities to deserts, or from civilized places to the wild places on the edge.  Long years ago when I first said "Yes" to the "Follow me"  of Jesus, I could not grasp a call to just go.  I needed some sense of where.  What is different now after journeying this far is the realization that the call of Christ is never to some place defined as where, but to wherever the road takes us.  

A Lost Mandate

The book was not a real page turner, but I was plodding along page by page when I came to one of those "stop and read it again" moments.  The book was written by Charles Foster and bore the title, "The Sacred Journey."  What stopped me in the midst of my read for a moment of pondering was near about midway through and it said, "By and large the Sermon on the Mount is utterly irrelevant in most modern churches.  It might as well not be there.  Our lives, our businesses, and our mission strategies are constructed very specifically according to precisely the principles so clearly denounced by Jesus."     

Of course, what Foster was pointing out was the way the church of our day has become so mindful of operating like a successful profit making business instead of a faithful spiritual community that seeks to serve even at the expense of sacrificing self to do so.  To the degree that the Sermon on the Mount does not fit within the mandate of the church, it can be said that it has lost its way.    

It is sad that the church has allowed itself to be compromised by the mores of culture and a leadership model that is more secular than spiritual because the world still needs the church.  It may seem to be relegated to some back street not frequented by many, but it remains an essential community for the larger communities around it.  Part of its importance is found in its uniqueness.  There is no community like the one called into existence by the Kingdom message of Jesus and the wind and fire of Pentecost.  A culture without a powerful spiritual community that exists only to point people to God is a poor and diminished community.  

A Broken Bond

Before my father-in-law's death back in 2004, he did it so when the opportunity came available to serve as the volunteer caretaker for the local cemetery, I figured it to be something I could do as a way of remembering him and serving the community as well.  The cemetery is not one of these manicured memorial gardens, but a few acres of land on the edge of town managed by the Methodist and the Baptist Churches.  One of my responsibilities is taking care of the upkeep expenses during the year.    

Another responsibility is to sell cemetery lots.  There is no advertising campaign, but a system based on need.  Two kinds of people call to buy grave plots.  There are those who are planning ahead and trying to spare their families the pain of the chore.  The other ones who buy plots are those who have recently lost a spouse, or child, or grandchild and need a resting place.  Unlike the first group, this group comes heavy with grief.   As dark was coming I went today to help a grieving family find that place for a loved one who had died.  

I have had associations with cemeteries all my life.  My father was buried when I was seven years old.  As a pastor I made many trips there with families for funerals and now I continue to go to offer a place and hopefully some comfort to those whose hearts are overwhelmed.  When called to preach over 50 years ago, I could not have imagined choosing to be with people who are grieving, and while I do not seek the task, it still comes and I am grateful in each moment that I stand not alone, but with the Risen Christ who broke the bond of the graveyard long ago.  

The Smoke

One of the most recognizable symbols of the Advent Season is the Advent Wreath.  The Advent Wreath is basically five candles standing on a green wreath that is laying on a table.  Four of the candles make a circle above the round wreath while the fifth candle which is more dominant stands in the middle.  Each Sunday one of the four candles is lit and then on Christmas Eve the final fifth candle stands burning with the others marking the end of the season and the coming of Christmas.    

It is a simple creation which brings both fire and smoke into the room and into the season.  The fire is very evident, but the smoke is never really seen by those who tend to the wreath or who worship in the sanctuary.  We forget sometimes that God appears in the smoke and fire.  He did on Mt. Sinai and on Pentecost. Experiencing the fire is easy enough, but the smoke requires stillness and waiting.  One moment the smoke is here and there and then it is nowhere to be seen, but the smoke still lingers in the room even though it is no longer seen or smelled.  

It is like this with symbols.  They are pointers.  They cause us to see for a moment what is always present with us even though no longer visible.  Even as we regard the sanctuary space as holy space, once we leave it is no longer visible to our eyes, but the memory of its presence points us toward the reality that everything around is holy.  God is not limited to the smoke and fire of the candle, but is always present in the invisible realm through which we constantly walk.  Always God is with us even in the moments of not being seen.  

The Quiet Season

Advent did today what it always does.  It slipped in among us quietly, no trumpets sounding, no bells ringing.  It is the first season on the Christian Calendar, but unlike the arrival of the chronological New Year each January, most folks hardly take notice.  Even in the church there is only the spiraling smoke of a single candle, music that is wistful, longing, and empty of blaring praise.  It is no reason it wins no popularity among the Christian community.  It is finally the season of waiting and none of us ever get excited about waiting.   

What the church starts demanding come the first of December is Christmas.  And while Christmas is a powerful and joyous celebration, Advent instead calls the faithful to pause considering the reality that the One who has come is coming again.  What does it mean to be in such an in between world?  What does it mean to live within the Kingdom that is still to come?  What does it mean to live with hope and anticipation that God does act in our lives to bring us deliverance from the darkness?    

The questions of Advent are many and they make us uncomfortable.  We would rather start welcoming the baby Jesus than recognizing that He is the Lord Who gives everything for us and calls us to respond with that same kind of unconditional obedience.  Advent does not invite us to go to a party, but to live as one who is ready to journey with Christ from here to there to wherever here to there takes us.     

Remembering Churches

In these later years of my life, I remember with such gratitude the church that nurtured me as I was on my way to faith in Christ.  Almost before I have memories, my mother was taking me to Sunday School at the base chapel where my father was stationed.  After his death and our return home, there were other churches such as Pierce Chapel out in the country where my father was buried, First Methodist in Waycross, Ga. which was not too far from the place we first lived, and later the Hebardville Church out on the edge of town where I was baptized.      

And while there were others, the one remembered like home was the Alamo Methodist Church in a small town by the same name.  It cared for me in my teenage years, gave me numerous opportunities to kneel at its altar, affirmed my call to preach, and sent me on my way into the future with a fledgling faith in Christ.  No matter how much education came my way over the years that followed, these churches provided a nurturing which not only set me on my way, but has sustained me for a life time.   

Lately, as I passed through some towns which are remembered mostly because I had friends who were cared for by the church on some corner in that town, I find myself remembering them and being thankful for a church that shaped them and enabled me to be influenced by their faithful living at a time when I could have gone another way.  What I have come to know in these recent days is that the church of all our childhoods helped put us on the road of faith and as we walked that road we were blessed by the presence of those we came to know as friends and the faith that was planted in each of us by some church from our past.  

The Ego Driven Church

The bigger is better model has caused many a preacher to sell his soul.  Well, perhaps, it is too much of an exaggeration to declare that such happens, but then many a preacher has been captivated by the idea that a bigger congregation, a bigger budget, and a bigger building is surely the intentions of God for those entrusted with building His Kingdom.  To look back over the years of ministry is to realize what a tantalizing and powerful temptation it is to get caught up in the building bigger model.   

This is not to say that every large church should be smaller, or that every pastor should do everything possible to keep things as they are, but to say that sometimes we decide that our personal agenda and what seems like the practical thing to do is certainly God's will as well.  Ego can be a demanding god and those who give leadership to the church must always be aware that it can be a useful tool for the evil one who seeks to undermine what God is seeking to do in the world.  Ego driven churches are not the same as Spirit driven churches.  I

It is hard for many to see the difference.  Ego driven churches are built around leadership, indebtedness, and the end justifies the means mentality.  In the short term they may seem to be doing many things right, but in the long term they are destructive forces within the Kingdom's work.  Anything or anyone who stands in the way of the Spirit taking hold of the church stands in a perilous place and may be doing the church of Christ more harm than good.     

The Best Model

When it seems that the church has gone off the rails and we find ourselves with more frustration and confusion than peace and a sense of holy presence, we often go back and re-visit that powerful rendering of the Day of Pentecost in the second chapter of Acts.  Somehow it has the power to help us see things, not as we have made them, but as God intended them to be.  What is revealed in those words filled with fire and wind is a reminder that the church is a spiritual community designed to be Holy Spirit driven.    

What seems apparent is that such no longer describes the ecclesiastical landscape.  The church of our day is driven more by culture and consensus than the Holy Spirit and the Holy Word He inspired "...so that everyone who belongs to God may be proficient, equipped for every good work."  (II Timothy 3;17)  So much of the spiritual and theological confusion of our day only speaks to this fundamental change.    Of course, what we quickly realize as we read the story in Acts is that it does not take long for the church to lose its way.  Hardly a few minutes had passed before there was confusion about the care of the poor.  And, the Hebrew attitude toward the Gentiles almost turned the new church into a Jerusalem based sect rather than a world wide spiritual community.  

Perhaps, the best model for the church to embrace is the one to which Paul points us as he writes, "He (Jesus) is the head of the body, the church..." (Colossians 1:18)  We often seem to have forgotten that the church is the embodiment of the body of Christ in the world which means that the church ends up being empty of things like love, grace, mercy, and self-sacrifice. A church not willing to go to the cross is no longer the church of Christ.   

An Endless List

Back in 2013 I started keeping what I have come to call a "Gratitude Journal."  The inspiration came from an author named Ann Voskamp who wrote a book about her year long journey with the 1000 entries she made in the first year.  I must confess to not being as good a journal keeper as she has proven herself to be, but I still plod on with my pen hoping one day to reach that point when I write the entry marked 1000.  While I hope it not an excuse for simply tolerating an undisciplined spirit, I do still maintain that the journey is more important than the arrival so I persist in plodding forward ever so slowly.    

What I have discovered through the process is a raised consciousness.  Things that would have simply come and gone unnoticed are more likely to become opportunities for whispering a word of gratitude even though the moment may not make it to the journal.  It has been as if I have been walking with eyes open when once they were closed.  Or, to use a Biblical image, not having eyes to see.    

There is so much for which to be thankful.  It is that way with all of us.  None of the dark clouds which weigh down so heavily upon us can take away the awareness that we are not alone and that we are not without the blessings which come to us through the grace of God.  As our hearts grow toward being more grateful, we find ourselves coveting with gratitude a brief conversation with a stranger, or the smell of food cooking in the house, or the gentle touch of someone we love.  It is an endless list, is it not, which makes me wonder in the moment why I have had so much trouble writing down a list of 1000 in all these years!

The Real Problem

There was a time back before retirement when I intentionally looked for old religious books.  One of the finds from those years was a copy of a pre-1900 "Book of Discipline."  Anyone familiar with the Methodist Church will know that "The Book of Discipline"  is a guideline and final word for all things Methodist.  This particular copy was small enough that it fit nicely into a shirt pocket.  When retirement came a little over ten years ago the "The Book of Discipline"  had an accompanying volume noted as "The Book of Resolutions."  The two would require not a shirt pocket, but an over the shoulder book bag!     

For this worn out Methodist preacher, the difference speaks volumes about how the church has become so complicated and confused.  In some ways it seems we have become worse than those Pharisees of Jesus' day with all their laws and regulations which got added to the Law of Moses.  Bigger is not always better.  Of course, this is a possibility largely ignored by the policy makers who want to dot "i's and t'" that are not even present.    

Call me an advocate of simple is better.  While I know going back to simple is not an option, the difference in the two books in about a hundred years does seem to point to one of the problems with the denomination of which I am an ordained minister.  In some Methodist circles "The Book of Discipline"  is more of a guide for the church than the Scripture which points to the real problem.

The Uncluttered Church

The church suffers from clutter.  Most of us know about clutter.  Clutter fills our homes and our lives.  In our homes cars disappear from garages and in our lives the real is overwhelmed by our personal trivial pursuits.  Our churches have gotten so filled with clutter that Jesus has become hard to see, or absent.  What really adds to the clutter of the church are those things which have no real spiritual value, but are required if the institutional part of the church is to continue to survive.    

The institutional church has an insatiable appetite for clutter.  While we often think of the church birthed on Pentecost as the church in its purest form, it took a little longer than a few verses for it to be transformed from a spiritual community into a demanding institutional monster.  If we are looking for the church in its purest form, we must look to Jesus.  In Ephesians 1:22-23 the Word of God speaks of Jesus' relationship to the church by saying, " (God) has made Him the head over all things for the church, which is His body,..."  

As we see the incarnate Jesus walking among us, we see the embodiment of the church.  We see the church in its purest form.  Unlike the unfolding picture of the church being sucked in by the demands of its institutional life, the church seen alive through the body of Christ seeks nothing for itself.  It is the purest form of a sacrificial and loving community that has ever existed on the earth.  He embodies the church of the Kingdom of God and calls us to give it life through our faithful living.

A Good Shaking

Every now and again the church needs a good shaking.  When it happens again, it will not be the first time, nor will it be the last.  It could be said that Jesus brought along with His announcement of the Kingdom coming, a shaking of the spiritual community that started being shaped on Mt. Sinai.  The Ten Commandments soon were viewed as not enough and soon all kinds of rules and regulations became attached to them to give them practical interpretation.  Jesus shook up the status quo.    

And, it has happened again and again.  The Reformation which gave the Protestant community its life speaks of an established spiritual community being shook to its core.  The Methodist movement into which I was ordained some fifty plus years ago came from a shaking of the Anglican Church in England.  It seems that from time to time the Church needs a good shaking to get rid of some of the superfluous clutter which becomes all too important to the status quo.    

Sometimes I wonder if these are not days when the Spirit is shaking the Church once again.  The ecclesiastical atmosphere is filled with verbal squabbles, the closed churches of last year, and the slow return all point to such a possibility.  Probably one of the worst things which could come to pass out of all the confusion is a return to what used to be.  When the Church truly gets a Spirit shaking, a new normal is sure to come to pass even though we may fight it tooth and nail.  

The Waiting Room

As we get older and older and, then a little older, most of us find ourselves spending more time than we ever imagined in a doctor's office.  And, maybe the truth is we spend more time in the waiting room than the treatment room!  Flannery O'Connor has a great story about a woman whose judgmental spew incited a small riot in the waiting room.  ("Revelation")  The stories we might be able to tell about our own observations may not be as entertaining as her story, but there are, nonetheless, still sights to see and people to remember.     

If we are unfortunate enough to come and go enough to and from that place, we find ourselves seeing a view of the world we did not know existed.  It is the gathering place of a community of people who are struggling to know wholeness again.  It is also a place where people begin to realize they are connected to others who share some measure of suffering.  Unexpected conversations break the monotonous tone of the music floating around in the room.  Acts of kindness and caring are seen and words of concern and hope are heard.    

The more we frequent those waiting rooms filled with hurting folks, the more we begin to realize it is a sacred place.  The Spirit of Christ is surely in that place as people begin to open their own lives up to strangers who are recognized as fellow travelers on the road. The brokenness so apparent in that place does not have the power to destroy hope, erase smiles, and separate us from the presence of the Holy Christ who promised to be with us in all the places of this earth which, of course, includes those filled waiting rooms.    

All Things

A few days ago Oswald Chambers, the writer of words written over one hundred years ago did it again.  He opened a window through which I had been looking for a lifetime.  Each time I had looked through the panes of that window, I saw the same thing.  But, a few days ago while reading the words, "The circumstances of a saint's life are ordained by God.  In the life of a saint, there is no such thing as chance,"  something different was seen. The Scriptural basis for the words of this devotional from "My Utmost for His Highest"  was Romans 8:28 which says, "We know that all things work together for good for those who love God..."    Of course, there is more, but those words were all it took to open my eyes to something new.      

Perhaps, you are like me when it comes to Romans 8:28.  It is a great verse to read in times of trouble.  In fact, I cannot remember a time when I read those words and did not appropriate its meaning to some kind of difficulty through which I was experiencing.  It is, after all, a great word of comfort in the face of overwhelming difficulty.   But, this last reading and I have been reading Chambers for over fifty years caused me to stop and consider those words, "all things."   

All things can be a reference to the unthinkable, but it can also speak of the moments of great blessings in our lives.  It can speak of the way that God places us in ordinary situations and common place relationships for some purpose which is greater than we could ever conceive.  Even in the good times, He can be seen working toward some greater good in our life.  What we may think of as filled with goodness may only be a prelude of how God is using the circumstances of our life to bring us into a place of even greater blessings, or it may be a way that He works to lead someone we hardly know into a place of such abundant grace that their life is turned upside down.   

A Dead Earthworm

It was too late for the earthworm.  While I am the guy who has stuck many of them on a fishing hook, I felt a moment of sorrow for this one as it laid there.  Somehow it had gotten away from the dirt.  Maybe it crawled out of the dirt and onto the concrete sidewalk early in the morning when the dew was heavy and the hard man made substitute for dirt was cool, but it was almost noon.  The sun was hot.  The concrete was hot.  And the earthworm was stretched out there long past dead.     

Perhaps, I should have paused, picked it up, and gave it a proper burial in the place where it started, but I thought about such a kindness only later when I had gone to another place.  An earthworm is such a small creature, some might even say it is an insignificant thing, but it is also a creation of the Creator and, thus, somehow is connected to each one of us who bears the imprint of the Holy One.  Does this mean that we are the lesser for the loss of the single earthworm?   And are we even the lesser for not thinking it to be so?

Most of us would not be given to such an extravagant conclusion.  Certainly, in the moment of seeing, I had no idea I would carry the image of this drying up dead earthworm stretched out on a sidewalk with me for days.  Maybe it is all just a matter of it wandering too far from the source of its life and a moment of not knowing how to return.  Whether or not it is true, it is certainly a thought worth pondering.

Hurrying to Wait

Whenever a trip begins, it is a common practice to offer a prayer before leaving home.  While it would be a good practice for any driving excursion, it is a discipline reserved for extended trips to the regions beyond the local area.   The prayers usually goes something like, "Lord, we ask your blessing on this journey which is before us.  We ask for the blessings of safe passage there and back.  Keep us inside a place of safety where danger and harm cannot touch us.  Go before us, be around us, be behind us, create a bubble of passage where we can move safely.  And, Lord, keep us patient. Speed us up, or slow us down to keep us in a safe place."    

Today brought the day when a return to home was ahead.   Though I wanted to get home before darkness settled over the road, it seemed like every step was spent waiting on someone who created a problem and hindered the journey.  Wherever I hurried, it was only to wait.  Toward the end of this day of hurrying up to wait, I went into a sandwich shop, placed an order, and left with what turned out to be the wrong order.  

Back in I went.  Again I waited and paced while the error which was delaying the trip home was being corrected.  Fifteen minute later I walked out with the right sandwich fussing under my breath about the messed up order only to hear this word coming up from deep within me saying, "Enjoy the moment.  Pay attention.  The clerk might have been a part of the plan of God."  As I walked toward the car with the right sandwich in my hand, I laughed aloud and prayed, "Thank you, Lord."

Unchangeable

When the day is filled with uncertainty and difficult decisions, it is good to pause for a moment and cast our eyes into the past.   The future we cannot know, but the past is locked firmly by the boundaries of our memories.  And, when we pause in the midst of dark filled days to look at the past, the first thing we see is the faithfulness of God.  What we are tempted to forget midst the chaos of a tough day is that fact that the God who has been with us, cared for us, loved us, and got us through other tough things, is still ever present with us.    

It may be that our circumstances are changing, but the God of yesterday is the same God who is showing up today.  Even as we have memories of not being forsaken, we can know in the deep places of our being that such remains true.  Even in the midst of trouble we are not forsaken.  God remains with us.  Circumstances may change, but God is utterly dependable.  As He has been with us in the days filled with sunshine, so is He with us in the days so stormy we cannot see our way forward.    

He is the same for us in the difficult times as He is in the good times.  In that part of our life, nothing has changed.  Our memories are precious.  They bring into view the good moments of our life.  Things stay ever present in our memory.  And, even as such is true with our memories of things shared with those we love, so is it true of the way God has been with us.  In the times of trouble, it is good to remember that His presence with us yesterday is nothing more than a promise He has made to be with us today and tomorrow and even beyond. 

Looking and Seeing

We do not see by looking.  Looking implies effort.  Looking speaks of what we set out to do and something for which we expect to see.  Seeing is not about effort, but about being.  To think about the difference between seeing and looking is to remember Jesus saying, "The kingdom of God  is not coming with things that can be observed....For, in fact, the kingdom of God is among you, within you."   (Luke 17:20-21)   Those who go looking with great effort for spiritual manifestations in the world are likely to look beyond them and not actually see what is breaking in all around them.     

The words of Jesus remind us that we see evidence of the Kingdom by being instead of doing.  There is nothing we can do to make how God is making Himself known in the world more visible.  It is all around us.  It is inside the fabric of every part of the creation.  We come to understand this not by human effort, but by simply being in the midst of it.  Mercy and grace is what opens the lids of our spiritual eyes so that we can see what we are unable to see by intentional looking.     

Ears to hear and eyes to see are wonderful gifts of grace.  Otherwise, we suffer from a kind of blindness that prevents us from being attentive to the present moment of our life.  We will always experience the Kingdom, the blessings of God, and the manifestations of His presence by being out there with no pre-determined plan and no set of expectations.  If we are looking for signs of God in the world, we are far more likely to see them by simply being in the world and waiting for God to do what God is always ready to do which is to be present with us.    

Glory

It has been a day when the sun refused to shine.  Gray has been the constant color of the sky that sent drizzling cold rain to the ground all day long.  Grateful is what I was when I looked at the pasture and saw the hay bales put out yesterday.  In a moment totally unexpected the late afternoon turned into the early evening with a sunset beyond description.  Instead of a great ball of fire in the sky which sent colors across Creation's canopy, there was instead a red and orange glow which lit up the sky making it something to behold.    

Seeing through the window what was going on outside caused me to walk out the front door onto the porch.  Even knowing what was out there did not prepare me for what was there.  The color seen through the window did not seem to be limited to the western horizon, but instead was like something mysterious which wrapped me up within it as I stepped outside.  For a moment it seemed that I had indeed stepped into glory.  It was a glory above me, around me, beside me, and a glory that wrapped  its arms around me. 

Imagine for a moment that the glory we see and experience on this earth is but a glimpse of the glory that is just beyond the gray darkness that separates this life from the life that is out there waiting for us.  It is not just the glory of the sun, but the glory of the Risen Christ which is out there waiting for us to step inside of it, ready for us to be surrounded by it, and ready to wrap its arms around us.  Indeed, the glory of the eternal is beyond description.  It is not only the glory that awaits us, but the glory in which those who have gone before us bask in the present moment with joy.  

The Hard Way

The hard part about affirming faith in Christ is not what other people think about us.  Certainly, there have been times when believing in Christ could be as costly as losing your life, but that day is not this day, at least not in the places where we serve Christ.  When I was young, peer pressure was a real deterrent to a young man who wanted to practice faith, but felt surrounded by those who would only ridicule.  As we get older and move more into our life, what others think becomes less a factor.    

What seems true is the that the real hard part about affirming faith in Christ has to do with what Christ thinks about us.  We want His approval; yet, we do not always want to offer a life style which is within the scope of His expectations of those who say they believe in Him.  It is not that His eyes look upon us with judgmental sternness.  Instead, we look upon ourselves and know that we live more according to our will and our agenda and not His will and agenda. It is at this point that the Christian faith becomes an unbearably hard thing.   

It becomes a hard thing because it is always hard to live two lives.  We are created to live one.  When we start saying one thing and living in a way that is inconsistent with what we declare to be our core values, we become like Adam and Eve.  We start hunting a fig leaf to cover our soul.  We start hiding when when we sense God is near.  We become dishonest with ourselves, one another, and the One who has made us.  If such is not a formula for a hard and difficult existence, there is not one.  Yet, here in the land of compromise we strive to live.  It is no wonder the Christian way becomes such a hard way that we seek another.

A Strange Mercy

There is divine mercy in not knowing what is ahead.  If we were given the gift of clarity and certainty about what tomorrow or next week would bring, we would no doubt spend the moments between now and then with such anxiety that living would be impossible.  Or, we would end up trying to manipulate the future so that tomorrow's story would have a different ending.  Of course, all the worry or work has little bearing on what is ahead in the unknown future which stretches ahead of us.    

When Abraham said yes to God's call to go, he had no idea where the act of going in obedience would take him. When Moses headed back to Egypt from the wilderness, he could not have imagined the circumstances which God would unfold in his life.  And when those disciples of long ago decided to leave everything and follow Jesus, they only thought they knew what such a response would mean for them.  Surely, when they looked back they must have realized they had no clue what it meant to follow Jesus into an unknown future.   To follow Jesus is to always follow into an unknown future.  The one thing Jesus never promised was an easy way.  He made it clear from the beginning that discipleship granted no exemptions from adversity, hard times, and difficulties.  

Anyone who reads the story of the gospel and comes to a different conclusion needs to read it one more time.  The truth is we never know what is ahead.  We only know Who is ahead.  Knowing Who is ahead means knowing that the One who is in charge of what is ahead is out there ahead of us making the way that might seem impossible, possible.  How thankful we are that we have learned that the One who holds tomorrow also holds us and everything which will touch us for harm and for good.

A Wise Heart

Not everyone enjoys birthdays.  Oh, for sure most of us enjoy a party and, perhaps, enjoy it even more if we are at the head of the table, but some folks would just as soon not take much note of the day.  It is understandable.  Each one we have does have a way of reminding us of the relentless march of time, the diminishing of what we used to be able to do, and at some point we start sensing that more are behind than ahead.   And even though I broke my arm at one of my boyhood birthday parties, I remain grateful for it and all the rest.    

Before anyone wants to send me a birthday greeting, please know mine for the year is long past.  What brings reflective thoughts to mind are the birthdays of some others in recent days.  Getting old is not always a lot of fun, but it speaks of years God has given and is giving.  It speaks of blessings of being with those who are important to us, who love us, and who we love.  It speaks of time to remember memories, sorting them out, laughing at some, and learning from others.  Birthdays are not bad things, but gifts from our Creator God who knows the number of our years and though sometimes hard to see, He has a purpose for them.      

Psalm 90:12 says, "So teach us to count our days that we may gain a wise heart."   Maybe there is more to this counting of our days than we see in candles and cakes, birthday presents, and having a a party.  Maybe the counting of our days is not a thing to be dreaded, but instead simply part of God's way of creating new things in us which we have never given any room to flourish.  Being wiser is not the same as being smarter.  Smarter is about knowing more information.  Wiser is about knowing how to live.  These recent years have made me wise enough to know I have still a long way to go in learning how to live with a wise heart, but it is good to be still on the way.   

The New Season

A recent conversation with a preacher friend who is finishing out his last year before retirement set me to thinking about this season of life.  When I first walked into it, I must confess to thinking I regarded it as the last and final season of life.  After all, when forty years have been logged in the pulpit, it is hard to imagine that stopping means entering into what some would describe as "the best is yet to be."  Those words sound good, but it seemed unlikely to me when the robe was put in the closet.    

After eleven years now I have come to know the truth of the words of the poem.  The best is not yet to be, but all around me.  And, the truth is, it always has been all around me.  My problem has been more in the seeing than anything else.  Too much of life is lived thinking about what is ahead, hoping its grass will be greener, and worshiping at the altar of productivity.  This season which seems framed chronologically is really a season to be experienced throughout life, but, unfortunately, ignored by most.    

God does not throw us away when we reach a certain age.  Instead, it seems more likely that He leads us into a different era of usefulness.  And, surprisingly enough, the manner in which He leads us into this new era of usefulness is often nothing like we figured it would be.  What must never be forgotten is that He never gets through with us.  When He moves us from one part of our life to another, it is not because we can no longer serve, but because there is something new He can do with us if we simply pay attention to the leading.

A Surprising Prayer

The page of the calendar announces that All Saints Day is near.  In many churches the day will be remembered this upcoming Sunday with an appropriate moment of celebration and remembrance.  When I gave leadership to churches as a pastor and preacher, All Saints Sunday was regarded as one of the very special celebration days in the life of the church.  It always seemed a bit strange in a church which had resurrection at its core that it was mentioned only once a year on Easter and, then again, by some on All Saints Sunday.     

All Saints Sunday is one of those moments which reminds of that the veil between heaven and earth, here and there, is a very thin one.  We affirm the communion of the Saints through recitation of a creed, but run from it as if being chased by ghosts.  Strange as it may seem to some, the further I have moved from the weekly routine of the church into the non liturgical cycles of the creation, the awareness of the thinness of the veil has grown greater.  While I do not see the spirits of the saints hovering around me, there is a sense in which I sense that I am never completely alone.     

When a hand tool abandoned by someone from an earlier time shows itself slightly buried in the dirt, or when I consider the stories the tall sprawling pecan trees have watched unfold over the last hundred years, or when I think about those families who have walked and worked this land before me, I find myself walking in a spirit of awareness never really afforded me through the liturgy of the church.  A few weeks ago while attempting some unfamiliar mechanical work on my tractor, I heard myself praying, "Lord, send the spirit of my father to watch over me as I do this."   I remember my father as a mechanic which I am not.  A prayer which I could not have been prayed years ago seemed to come forth in such a natural manner that it surprised even me.  

Still Speaking

Every day is filled with the possibility that God will speak to us, or reveal Himself to us in some way.  It is strange that so many times we live with no expectations of such happening.  We get lulled into a world view which affirms that while God did reveal Himself in the Biblical story, such can no longer be expected.  Times have changed.  The kind of manifestations of God in the world were necessary in a  primitive culture which ours is not.  Such is the thinking of so many in our day.    

Even though it is the thinking of many people in our day, even those who never miss an opportunity to get in the church building when the doors are opened, there are many around us who speak of a different kind of relationship with our Creator God.  Maybe it is not necessary for everyone to see things in the same way.  And, maybe it has to do with expectations.    

Those who have no expectation of God making Himself known in their daily life may be going through their lives with eyes and ears closed to the presence and the sounds of the divine all around them.  It is easy to remember Jesus saying, "Let anyone with ears to hear listen.!"  (Mark 4:9)  Of course, we have no special ears other than those inner ears that are open to divine possibilities in every moment.  What Jesus is saying is that those who live with such expectations will find those expectations becoming reality.  

Swimming to Escape

Somewhere around 200-300 AD spiritual seekers started moving from the civilized areas into the desert regions as a way of responding to what God was doing in their lives.  As they appear on the pages of history, they collectively bear the name of Desert Fathers.  Anthony was one of the first to lead the way.  Thomas Merton, an author of our day, wrote in his book, "The Wisdom of the Desert Father,"  "In those days men had become keenly conscious of the strictly individual character of ‘salvation.’ Society — which meant pagan society, limited by the horizons and prospects of life ‘in this world’ — was regarded by them as a shipwreck from which each single individual man had to swim for his life."     

The image of society being a "shipwreck from which each...had to swim for his life"  is a powerful and thought provoking image.  We are likely to think that these ancient seekers of God went to the desert as a way of being able to focus on their spiritual lives without any distractions when they were actually went to escape what seemed the have the potential to destroy them. Theirs was indeed a different view of the culture in which they lived before their escape to the desert.    

Not too many of us can escape as did these Desert Fathers, and most likely, few of us have any desire to go somewhere and live in a primitive self sustaining way the rest of our days.  Even though going to the desert may not be in our future, the Desert Fathers remind us of the power culture can have over us.  Many of them went to the desert when Christianity became legitimized instead of persecuted.  Being a Christian became easier and in some ways more dangerous.  Not much has changed since those days.  We may not be swimming for our lives, but it would do us well to be aware of the powerful influences which can corrode even the strongest faith.

Around the Curve

We cannot see beyond the curve in the road.  What lies out of sight is unknown to us.  We cannot know if there is danger ahead, something like a rock slide which will surely push us over the edge, or more of the flower lined road which is in the rear view mirror.   Life does  not give us peeks around the curves, around the bends, the twisting roads that run before us.  And, most assuredly, those unseen places filled with whatever, are out there for us to reach and pass through.    

Since we cannot see beyond the curve in the road, it is a good thing to know the One who sees not only where we are and where we have been, but where we are going as well.  What we sometimes discover as the journey unfolds is that where we are going is nothing like where we thought we were going.  In those moments it is good to know our Father God has not only seen what is ahead, but has also been preparing us along the way for the unseen and unexpected.  It is not a road map that we carry with us to make this journey, but something all together different.  What God gives to us to take along the way is something called faith.      

Faith enables us to go around the curve.  Without it many of us would stop and cautiously peer around the edge, or maybe there would be such fear, we would simply stop and turn around and go the way we have come.  But, alas, turning around is mostly not the option.  Life is about going ahead.  It can only be lived in one direction.  And, so we must go because going forward speaks of the way He created us.  Around the curve we go.  Maybe we do not go with boldness or without fear, but we go.  We go simply because it is the way forward and more importantly because God can be trusted to get us beyond and through whatever unexpected danger lurks ahead in our journey.  His plan is to bring us Home and somewhere along the way, we can count on reaching that place where He has called us to be and dwell forever.