New Reads

As the Lenten season continues to move along, we may find ourselves looking for something new in the area of spiritual disciplines.  One thing might be to consider different reading material.  The truth is we often get in a rut in our spiritual reading.  We find an author or two that we really like and suddenly we are reading nothing that does not bear that name.   New and different writers often introduce us to a different viewpoint, or at the very least, can cause us to see old spiritual truths through a different window.

 

If biographies are our choice, we might find some readings about people like George Mueller, Hudson Taylor, E. Stanley Jones, or Charles Spurgeon.  Their stories were written in a different era, but each one had a powerful impact for Christ.  Of course, these are only a few examples.  Or, find some of the spiritual classics such "The Pilgrim's Progress," by John Bunyan, or "The Imitations of Christ," by Thomas A 'Kempis.  Look for some things which have stood the test of time.  There is a reason something continues to be read by one generation after another. 

 

Of course, one thing which keep us from exploring different reading options is that we tend to look for the easy read.  Some of the things we read may cause us to wonder what the writer is trying to say to us.  This is not necessarily a bad thing.  It may just mean we need to read slower, maybe even read shorter portions which allow us time to reflect on what we are seeking to understand.  While we do not have to read stuff that is way over our head, there is nothing wrong with a good read challenging us to think and pray as we journey through it.

Slow Down

The part of our life that is given over to spiritual disciplines is not to be a hurried and measured time.  Too often we lay the Bible down beside the clock.  We say we do it to keep our commitment time, but sometimes it seems more that we want to be sure we do not go over.  In the beginning of our spiritual journey, duty is what drives us and not so much our desire for God.  It is not really necessary to measure the quiet part of our journey with minutes.  What is far more important is knowing that a connection has been made which settles our soul and sets us out on our journey with God once again.

 

The disciplined moments are best when they are unmeasured and unhurried.  Within such moments there is time for speaking and time for listening.  There is time for reading and reflection.  There is time for learning and soaking.  The hurried spirit is never a spirit that has been soaked with the Word, or soaked in the still and peaceful presence of the Holy Spirit.  The hurried spirit is anxious to get back to the important stuff of life even while engaging itself in the most important stuff of the soul.

 

It is the soul which serves as our connecting point with the God who has created us.  How strange that it is the most neglected part of our life.  While many often get up early to go the gym for a physical workout before going to work, not as many get up early to tend to the quiet moments with God which strengthen the spirit and empower the soul  One of the most dangerous things we do with our life is hurry.  It takes us out of the present and away from being able to experience the fullness of the Holy Spirit who has taken up residence in our soul.

Soul Food

Spiritual disciplines have no inherent saving power.  As we remember Jesus' encounters with the Pharisees, practicing spiritual discipline is no guarantee of spirituality.  What they appeared to be was no indication of the condition of the heart.  It is no different with us.  Spiritual disciplines shape us.  The Holy Spirit uses them to  make us into the image of Christ.  Of course, the image He seeks to create in us is the one which resembles the heart and the spirit of Christ.  What He desires to do in us is to enable us to respond spontaneously in a Christ like spirit to the situations with which we are confronted.

 

Galatians 5:23 says, "...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control."  Who among us would not choose to live with these things being expressed in our living?  Sometimes we have started the day deciding that throughout the day we will live as one who models the list in this passage of Scripture.  It does not take long to realize that it is not going to happen.  These things do not come forth naturally and spontaneously from our life.  But, then, they were not meant to be.  They are after all, not the results of human determination, but the fruit of the Holy Spirit abiding in us.

 

What we cannot do for ourselves,  the Holy Spirit can do as we open ourselves up to the nurturing and shaping power of spiritual disciplines.  Spiritual disciplines are an important part of the process of being made into the image of the Christ.  As the Spirit of Jesus grows in us, takes a greater hold of our heart, so does our response begin to resemble the response He would make were He standing midst the circumstances of our life.  As meat and vegetables are food for the body, so are spiritual disciplines food for the soul and spirit.

Ask and Pray

Learning to pray has put me in a life time classroom.  I have never made a high enough grade to be able to graduate or even think about quitting.  There is always something new to learn and to put in practice.  In the days when I pastored the Vidalia United Methodist Church, a Service of Prayers for Healing was offered monthly on a Sunday evening.  It was an announced service with a specific purpose so people who came did so because they had a need.  One of the things I learned during those Sunday evenings was the value of asking people how they wanted me to pray for them.  What I often thought was obvious was frequently wrong. 

 

Asking those who ask us to pray for them a simple question like, "How can I pray for you?" is always a helpful thing.  First, it keeps us away from our assumptions.  Secondly, it gives evidence to the one in need that their request is not being taken lightly.  And, finally, it leads us into a more focused prayer instead of the shotgun approach which is broad enough to cover every possible contingency.  People who ask for our prayers are people who need our care and anything we can do to offer genuine expressions of care is a helpful and positive thing.

 

One thing often noted is the way the moment of asking for prayers comes and goes.  It often seems to end the conversation.  It is as if there is nothing more to say after the request has been made and our assurance of prayers to be offered is given.  Instead of being a conversation closer, the moment of asking is filled with opportunity to open our heart to the one whose heart is being opened to us.  It is not a moment to be wasted, but such is often the case.  Maybe it will not be the next time. 

Prayer Request

When someone asks us to pray for them, we always give assurance that we will pray.  When asked to pray, no one ever says, "No."  But, sometimes we do the unpardonable thing.  We forget.  It is not that we did not intend to pray when we said we would because in the moment we figured we would.   The truth is saying "Yes" to someone's prayer request is something we do without even thinking.  We respond not out of concern and love, but out of habit and a duty.

 

I have a friend who when asked to pray responds not by saying, "Yes" but by saying, "I will pray for you now."  Wherever he is, he prays.  Whatever he is doing, he stops and prays.  If he is in a store, or on the street, or in an office, he prays.  When asked to pray, he prays not later, but now.  He gives no regard to what is going on around him, who is watching, or what someone might think.  He just prays in the moment.

 

Maybe, just maybe, this is what people are really asking of us when they ask us to pray for them.  Maybe they are not asking for prayers in the future so much as they are asking for prayers in the present moment.  The present moment is really an important moment for the person asking for prayers for that person is seizing it, risking being vulnerable, and asking for help.  It is an act that requires faith, but also a certain amount of courage.  It is an act which says, "There is something I cannot do by myself and I am asking you to help me."  Such faith and courage surely is worthy of a response that also speaks of that same faith and that same courage.  When asked to pray, do not wait until later.  Pray in the moment. 

Ask and Listen

I remember the first time it happened.  A young woman came into the office overwhelmed by a broken marriage and the divorce that loomed in her near future.  She was distraught, down, and not sure where life was taking her.  After a time of listening to her, I ask if we could pray.  And, then, remembering a book I had recently read on prayer, I paused for a long few minutes of silence and asked God to tell me how to pray for her.  My mind was going in several directions, but in that moment of asking and listening, I heard one word surfacing in my spirit,  "Peace.  Pray that she will have peace."

 

I wish I was further along in this journey of praying.  I do not always pause and ask God how I should pray when someone asks for my prayers.  Too often I just jump in with the words which seem appropriate in such a moment.  They are often words that sound trite and expected.  Sometimes they leave me with an empty feeling which makes me wonder how they affected the one for whom I was praying and who was listening to my praying. 

 

The better course when praying for others is to go slow instead of praying in a rush.  The better course is to ask God, "How should I pray for this person?' and then sit in the silence until some sense of direction is heard.  It may be something that is misunderstood by the one waiting for the praying to begin.  Maybe this is what keeps us from asking and listening.  The disciples saw Jesus praying and ask to be taught how to pray.  It is a good discipline for us as well.

The First Voice

Beware!  When you enter the silence to listen for the voice of God, the first voice you are likely to hear is your own.  This is one reason why it is necessary to practice this spiritual discipline of listening.  It is not something that we are likely to get the first time.  Actually, we may find ourselves hearing many different voices, but the one most likely to deceive us is our own.  It is most likely to deceive us because it is saying the thing we want to hear.  We do not enter into this discipline without expectations of what God might say to us and so it is easy to hear what we want to hear Him saying to us.

 

Discernment is important as we begin to learn how to listen for the voice that Elijah heard long ago as he clung to his despair.  If what we perceive as voice of God sounds like a repeat of something we have thought, it is likely we have not really moved deep enough into the silence.  One of the hardest things to silence is our own voice which quietly speaks the needs and wants of our own ego.  It is only as we begin to spend time in the silence that we will learn to recognize how our own voice is expressed.

And, of course, the same thing can be said about the voice of God.  The way it is expressed and the way we hear it may not be what we expected.  It may even surprise us.  The voice of God can surely be heard by those who are intent on listening, but instead of a monologue it may simply be a single word.  It may not even be experienced as a word, but it will be experienced as the way He has chosen to make Himself and His will known to us.

Far Fetched

For some it surely seems far fetched that anyone of us could hear God speaking to us.  Actually, incredible and amazing are better words.  It is unfortunate that we live in a world where there is such skepticism when it comes to the Sacred One entering into the human realm in such a way that something resembling conversation is possible.  The problem with dismissing the possibility that God would speak to is that it requires dismissing those parts of the God/human story where His voice is spoken and heard.  

 

But, what it also means is that the Holy Spirit is silenced.  The Word tells us that the Holy Spirit does such things as teach us, remind us of the teachings of Jesus, convict us of our sins, and provide leadership to us.  It also speaks of Him as one who abides and dwells in us.  Are we to expect that this holy one who is present in us has now been silenced so that His voice can no longer be heard?  Is the Spirit limited to an indirect role instead of a direct one?  Are we to look for divine clues left for us so that we can figure out what it is that God would say to us?

While all this listening to God stuff sounds strange, maybe even off the wall, to some, it seems more like a part of the mystery of God being God.  The fact that I cannot understand it completely is no problem for all of our journey is a journey that is filled with faith from beginning to end.  It only makes sense that God would continue to find ways to speak His word and His will to us.  Too many things about this relationship that He has initiated with us point us toward expecting to hear Him as we learn how to listen. 

The Voice

Listening for the voice of God in the silence is not an easy thing for most of us.  Our first problem is with the silence.  When it comes, it seems so loud that we cannot abide it.  We do not know what to do with it.  Not being accustomed to being in silence, it is disconcerting and we find ourselves actually distracted by the fact that there is no noise commanding us to listen.  It is as if we are listening for something that is not there any longer.  Trying to hear what is not there to hear is the first thing that must be laid aside in order to hear the Voice that seeks to be heard in the silence.

 

And, of course, at first we do not really know what we are expecting to hear.  By the time the boy Samuel finally responded to the Voice in the dark silence of night, God had called out to him three times.  He heard each time, but he did not know what or Who he had heard.  He needed someone to guide him into being able to hear.  Each time he heard his name being called in the darkness, he went to his spiritual mentor, Eli.  Finally, with his attention awakened, Eli realized what was happening and told the boy what to do.  Apparently, Eli had memories of hearing the Voice.

 

The truth is we may not be able to recognize that God is speaking when we start journeying into the silence.  A part of us may not actually expect it to happen which is, of course, an adversary to hearing.  Learning how to listen and discern does not come naturally to most of us.  Like any spiritual discipline, it is likely to take practice.  It may even require having someone like Eli to help us figure out what is happening in this place we are not accustomed to walking.  The land of silence is a strange place for us and it will require not just determination, but faith that God will speak to us as surely as it has spoken to others.

The Scary Place

The scary place is not the house down the street that is supposed to be haunted, or a room crowded with strangers.  It is not the deep woods, nor is it the dentist's office.  The real scary place in our world is the place filled to overflowing with silence.  Everywhere we go we find there are people who understand our fear so they pipe in music into places like elevators and turn on six blaring televisions in rooms where we must wait with others.  When we leave the noisy world for home, we turn on all kinds of noise makers until exhaustion drives us to bed.

 

Jesus may have found meaning in the silent places such as the wilderness or a mountain top, but we would rather follow Jesus into the lion's den before going to the silent places.  Yet, as we grow in our faith, we find a certain curiosity about the spiritual benefits of the silent places.  Others have gone there and found a deeper faith.  Maybe such might be true for us is what we think, but still there is this fear of what it might be like to experience the silence.

 

Would we really find the presence of God in such a scary place?  If the silence was truly overwhelming, so heavy it seems that it is dripping like water from a rain soaked tree, would we find something in that place which would truly satisfy the thirst we have for an intimate walk with God?  Why is it that we are programmed to run from the quiet places?  What would happen in our walk with God if we dared to enter into the silence with every intention to sit there and just stay?

Hearing and Listening

The ear makes no distinction between hearing and listening.   But, there is a big difference.  Any husband who has been married more than a few days knows that hearing and listening are two distinct things.  Hearing what a wife is saying is one thing, listening is another.  Ask any woman if the difference is not clear.  Hearing takes place without any listening when the one doing the hearing is not concentrating on the one doing the talking, but occupied with other things. 

Is it not possible that God is speaking more than we are hearing because we are not really listening?  Oswald Chambers wrote, "What hinders me from hearing is that I am taken up with other things."  The real issue may not be the silence of God, but the fact that we are distracted and taken up by other things which seem so important to us.  Certainly there are the obvious things with which hinder our hearing and listening ability.  The thing that seems to be glued to the palm of our hand is one, a re-run on the television may be another, and a job may be still another.  But, it could also be some unexpected things like our insistence that a certain number of chapters in the Bible must be read every day, or a certain amount of time must be spent in prayer, or serving on a bunch of committees at the church.

The voice of God may indeed be filling up the world around us, but we are not really listening.  Every now and again we catch the sound of His voice, but never enough to stop us in our tracks to listen to the voice.  Maybe we should just lay everything down and put it away for a moment and speak the words that the boy Samuel spoke long ago in the darkness, "Speak, (Lord) for your servant is listening."  (I Samuel 3:10)

The Quiet Discipline

While I must confess to falling short many times when it comes to praying, it is not because of a failure to read about prayer.  I probably have more books dealing with this spiritual discipline than any other topic.  While I may not be as faithful in my prayers as I should, I have for a long time been a student of prayer.  One of the things I have noticed over the years is the way my praying has changed.  My praying is certainly different than it was in the beginning and it has continued to evolve into something different than it was even a short time ago.

 

I was reminded of this the other morning while reading a devotional guide entitled, "A Guide to Prayer."  We have all had the experience of reading something and almost immediately saying, "Yes, Yes."  Sometimes we find that others say what we have experienced much better than we might have verbalized it.  Such a moment came the other morning it my devotional time as I read, "But during the past decade I have come to believe that prayer is not a matter of my calling in an attempt to get God's attention, but of my finally listening to the call of God, which has been constant, patient, and insistent in my inner being."  While I am not yet where I would choose to be, I am aware that I have been involved in learning to listen for what God might be trying to say to me.

 

As I think about learning to listen, I know that I have come to understand the value and the need to pay attention.  If we want to hear God, we have to pay attention to where we, who is with us, and what is going on around us.  God does not speak to us out of the future, but out of the present moment.  If we are not paying attention in the present moment He has given us, we will surely miss what He would say to us in it. 

The Disciplined Life

The Invitation to Observe a Holy Lent is among other things an invitation to embrace the disciplined life.  We hear this as we read,  "I invite you, in the name of the Lord, to observe a holy Lent, by self-examination, penitence, prayer, fasting, and almsgiving; and by reading and meditating on the Word of God."  Of course, this list of spiritual disciplines is not an exhaustive one, but one that points us toward some of the things which can nurture our faith and connect us more deeply to God.  Some spiritual disciplines are very obvious to us.  Others are hidden in plain sight.

 

For example, cannot hearing be considered a spiritual discipline?  The Word of God is full of stories of men and women who heard God speaking to them.  People like Moses, Samuel, Elijah, Mary, and Paul immediately come to mind.  Even though we read their story and believe it to be true, there lingers in our own spirit a very real doubt about God speaking to us.  Maybe His voice was heard by some of the ancient ones who walked across the stage of Biblical history, but it does not happen in this day and age to folks like you and me. 

 

Such thinking leads to the question, "Why Not?"  Could it be that we have lost the ability to hear the voice of God?  Or, could it be that when we hear it, we fail to recognize it for what it is?  Is it possible that we have settled for less than God intends?  Hearing is not always easy in these days when there is so much noise and so many voices vying for our listening energy.  Anyone who has intentionally settled into a quiet space may begin to hear things that have been impossible to hear when life is raging loudly around them.  Maybe God has not grown silent.  Maybe we are not quiet enough to hear. 

The Day After

How long do you wear the ash smudge on your forehead once you have left the Ash Wednesday service?  Some have asked as if there is some liturgically correct amount of time the sign of mortality should be worn.  I have seen the mark of the cross literally being wiped off as the wearer exits the door and I have run into folks in the afternoon who told me that got theirs at the early morning service before going to work. 

 

Some folks think it is pretentious to wear a sign on your forehead which might be seen by others as pious.  Others wear the ashes as a witness to their faith in Christ.  There is, of course, no proper time to wear the black smudge.  The ashes contain no spiritual power, but are simply signs that point toward repentance and mortality.  Not all churches observe the practice.  As I was growing up it was almost unheard of in the Protestant church communities and was seen as something which was observed only in the Roman Catholic tradition.

Fortunately, times have changed and it is a service more widely practiced now than it was in earlier years.  As one who came to the ritual late, it has proven to be a holy moment of connecting to a tradition that is filled with spiritual power.  As we go to receive the ashes, the line of believers may go from the back pew to the altar, but for those who look more closely, a line may be seen that extends from centuries ago to the present age.  Those in this line are invisible to the unseeing eye, but for those who have eyes to see it is like seeing those who have gone on before and who are now gathered in the heavenly place as a part of that great crowd of witnesses. 

Lent 2018

Imagine the surprise of a stranger to church stuff who wakes up one Wednesday morning in February and decides to attend the much advertised Ash Wednesday Worship at the neighborhood church.  Ash Wednesday worship is one of the strangest worship services on the church calendar.  Those who define good worship as something which makes them feel good will give this service two thumbs down.   If someone leaves this service and says, "I enjoyed the service, Preacher," you have to wonder if they slept through the whole thing.

 

There is something powerfully disconcerting about walking up to the front of a sanctuary and standing before the preacher who is in your space and looking you in the eye as he says the words of the ritual for Ash Wednesday.  "Remember you are dust and to dust you shall return."  Those who hear those words and get the ashes wiped across their forehead get a jolt of reality which is hard to shake.  There is nothing about the moment which makes us feel good.  Most of us never think seriously about our own dying and then there comes this moment inside a worship service where someone is looking us in the eye and saying, "Hey, you!  You are going to die!"

 

As we consider our own mortality, we are preparing ourselves for the celebration of Resurrection Sunday which is surely coming.  Even as there is no resurrection without the cross, neither is there any personal awareness of the power of resurrection unless we seriously look at the reality of our own death.  The church invites us to share in the Lenten journey so that we might make ourselves ready to celebrate and share in its most powerful message which is the message of the resurrection.

Dry Fountains

Someone once told me to be careful about a doctor who has dying plants in his waiting room.  I guess they were saying something to me about the value of first impressions.  It took.  I never go into a doctor's office without checking out the health of the plants!  But, my problem goes beyond house plants.  There is a newly built church near our house which has a three tier outdoor fountain as the primary focal point of the entrance.  However, it never has any water spurting up and flowing over and down.  It is empty.  There is the promise of flowing water in a fountain, but a closer look reveals it is dry.

While I am not suggesting that the nearby church is dry spiritually, or that it is promising one thing and not delivering, it makes me think about the kind of messages churches send and the expectations of the people who show up to share in its life.  Just like it is in human communication, not every message is intentionally sent.  Unattended grounds and a shabby looking building may speak to the value the people inside place on their church.  A church sign or worship bulletin that never changes may seem like a small thing, but it is also a message saying, "Do not pay this any attention."  And a preacher who is obviously unprepared and wandering all over the Bible apparently does not have a high regard for preaching, nor is there much regard for the time of all those who have come.

And, then there is the dry fountain.  I would much rather see water going in the air and spilling out over the sides.  I would much rather be reminded that there is an abundant flow of that living water about which Jesus spoke.  I would much rather be reminded that there is so much spiritual life in that place that it spills over.  I would rather be reminded that there is enough grace that even the foulest sinner can be washed clean and then, even cleaned again. 

Set Apart

Back in the Old Testament story we read about things like priestly garments, lampstands, and bowls being subjected to rituals of cleansing.  Once cleansed they became holy and were to be used for holy purposes.  Things and objects were set apart for holy purposes.  Of course, such a practice is not a primitive practice, but as current as today.  Our church buildings are set apart for holy purposes as are the objects within them.   When a something new such as a cross, or a communion table, or a piano is given, there is always a service of consecration.  No longer is the object regarded just as a table or a piano, but as something which is holy.

 

It is not just objects which are made holy, but people like you and me.  And it is not just the ordained folks who wear the robes and stoles who are holy, but all of us who bear the marking of one of the baptized ones.  The Scripture refers to believers in Jesus as saints.  This is not a term reserved for those who have followed Jesus for a certain number of years, or received an appropriate education, or who have joined one church or another.  It is how God would have each believer see himself or herself.  We have been made holy and set apart through the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross and the grace given from that single act.

 

When the Word refers to the saints, it is referring to folks like you and me.  All of us.  Each of us.  No one is excluded.  Therefore, as a believer in Jesus we have, like some of the holy things in our places of worship, been set apart for holy purposes.  God has a plan for each one of us.  We are His holy people, those set apart not for our purposes, but for His purposes.  We are surely sinners, but saints also because of the incredible life changing grace of God. 

The Holiness Folks

When I was growing up long years ago, it was a common sight to see a big tent go up on the edge of town.  We all knew it was not because the circus was coming to town.  Instead, it was a revival tent.  As a boy I never paid any attention to who was sponsoring the tent revival, but I knew a preacher would show up and the whole town would hear his voice in the evening over that loud speaker system that blared out from the pulpit inside the revival tent.  Those of us who were laid back Methodists and comfortable Baptists spoke of those who met under the tent as "holiness folks."

 

What we said with some measure of derision is actually what we are all called to be.  In one of Peter's letters to the church he wrote, "...it is written, 'You shall be holy for I am holy.' "  (I Peter 1:16)  And in another place in the same letter the Apostle wrote, "But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's own people..." (I Peter 2:9)  While we may not like the moniker "holy " being used to speak of us and while we may even politely deny it, such is who we are called to be.  We are called to live holy lives.  We are called to be holy people.

 

Of course, what we have learned is that being holy is not something that is humanly possible.  It was never intended to be.  But, it is Holy Spirit possible.  What we cannot do ourselves is something the Holy Spirit can do with us if we are willing to be as an empty vessel in His hands.  When we come to the place where our heart's desire has nothing to do with what we want for ourselves, but is instead about what God wants for us, we have given the Holy Spirit a blank check on our lives and there is nothing then that is impossible for Him to do in us and through us.  By His power we can even become one of those holiness folks. 

Be Sanctified

Sometimes reading the Word brings us to uncomfortable places.  One such place is I Thessalonians 5:23 where it is written, "May the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely."  Another such place is found a little earlier in the same letter and says, "For this is the will of God, your sanctification."  (I Thessalonians 4:3)  This word sanctification sends shutters through our soul.  It really frightens us.  First of all, we are not really sure we want to be that much of a Christian.  Fanatics talk about being sanctified, not regular down-to-earth members of mainline Protestant churches.  And secondly, it sounds like something which is impossible.

 

Most of us struggle a bit to understand what the Word is saying to us about this aspect of the spiritual life.  In the beginning my own understanding was too much experience defined.  As the years have gone by, my understanding has changed to speak more of a level of the spiritual life that begins but has no end.  Oswald Chambers, my most read devotional writer, said, "Sanctification means every power of body, soul, and spirit chained and kept for God's purpose only...It means being made one with Jesus so that the disposition that ruled Him will rule us."  When I read these words the other morning, I felt something inside of me saying, "Yes, yes."

 

Sanctification is not so much about a moment, or an experience as it is about a natural and spontaneous life that is lived beyond the reaches of ordinary human endeavor and determined will.  It reveals itself in the unplanned responses to life around us.  It reveals itself in those moments when we act without thinking about the appropriate response.  It reveals itself in such moments because always it is not about what we can do, but what the Holy Spirit is able to do through a life that is waiting on the inner prompting and directive of God. 

A Old Remembrance

It has been 48 years now since that Tuesday morning at Asbury College when I found myself in the midst of a revival that lasted a week, caused classes to be cancelled, and changed more lives than will ever be counted.  While I normally think about it most Februarys, the memory of it came back with a rush this morning as I was reading a devotional reading from Oswald Chambers.  It is one of those moments in my life that can be discussed objectively up to a point and then it simply becomes one of those divine mysteries that cannot be completely explained.

 

What I know is that those days changed my life.  What I know is that it provided a spiritual undergirding for a life of ministry.  While I have had many other powerful spiritual encounters over the years, none can really compare with the lasting impact those days had upon my heart.  I went to Asbury with a heart full of skepticism and a mind full of doubt.  I spoke of myself as a Christian, but at that point my faith could have likely gone another way very easily.  What happened in those hours in the college auditorium was something I would normally have taken lightly.  Perhaps, if attendance had not been required for the hour of chapel in which it started, I never would have gone.

 

But, once I went, I stayed.  I stayed and came to an experience with the Holy Spirit working in my life that I am forever grateful.  I have learned over the years that what happened at the altar was only the beginning of being drawn into a deeper spiritual life.  It left me with a longing for God that has continued to grow through the decades.  As I read Chambers this morning, I felt grateful that I heard the call to live the sanctified life and that my heart was open enough to begin moving toward it.  I am grateful that the journey continues to this day. 

Wilderness Walkers

Back around the third century, individual disciples of Jesus started making permanent pilgrimages into the deserts of Egypt and Syria.  Collectively these men (and some women) became known as the Desert Fathers.  It was a time in history when Christianity had not only become widely accepted, but was the state religion.  Thomas Merton wrote about these wilderness walkers in his introduction to the book, "The Wisdom of the Desert."  "Society was regarded (by St. Anthony and the Desert Fathers) as a shipwreck from which each single individual man or woman had to swim for his life...These were men (The Desert Fathers) who believed that to let oneself drift along passively accepting the tenets and the values of what they knew as society, was purely and simply a disaster."

 

As I have verbally rambled through this past week's writing on the wilderness theme, it may have been a bit confusing as to the reason we end up in something akin to a spiritual wilderness.  Is it caused by our sin?  Is it something into which God leads us?  Or, do we experience it as something we are compelled to do by the Spirit? Is it the result of longing, hungering and thirsting after God?  Are we drawn to such moments?  As in the case of The Desert Fathers, are we trying to get to a safer place?  The more I rambled the more it seemed that it might be any of these things or maybe even all of them.  And, of course, there is always the option, "None of the above."

 

What does seem apparent is that we find ourselves in some kind of spiritual wilderness from time to time as we journey toward God.  The Biblical story has a physical setting for the experiences of the wilderness.  Our setting is mostly invisible and spiritual, but it is a setting where God's bidding can be discovered by those who linger.  Against the setting of what might be called ordinary Christian living, we come to those moments when a time apart and away is needed and necessary if we are to know who we are and to Whom we belong.  In such moments we walk not on the mountain where glory abounds, but in the wilderness where we hold nothing in our hands but our longing for God.

God in the Wilderness

In "New Seeds of Contemplation" Thomas Merton wrote, "It (contemplation) knows God by seeming to touch Him.  Or rather it knows Him as if it had been invisibly touched by Him...Touched by Him Who has no hands...Contemplation is also the response to a call: a call from Him Who has no voice, and yet, Who speaks in everything that is..."  It is surely this way in those wilderness wanderings of the soul.  In those moments we take nothing with us and we walk empty handed.  Our longing is not for the things of God, but for God.  We long for the touch of the One who has no hands and we listen for the voice of the One who has no voice.

It is a simple thing to walk in silence seeking God, but so difficult to explain to those who stand outside the experience and look with the objectivity and the logic of the human spirit.  To be completely alone and to learn how to listen in the midst of silence is a new and different kind of moment for all of us who are running the frantic pace of secular living.  It is not even something we want to do, but finally we find ourselves giving into the compelling need of the soul to once again be vitally connected to the living God who brought us into being and upon Whom we know we depend for our life. 

 

And, so, with nothing more than our longing for God, we embrace the unwanted solitude and uncomfortable silence.  It is not that we want to hear a Word from Him, but that we must.  It is not that we want to know His touch, but that we must.  Like someone in the desert searching for water so do we experience these moments when God seems to be absent. There is unrelenting desperation within us and a hunger for God's touch and voice to assure us that we are not alone.  While we thought we needed the things God provided, we learn in our wilderness moments that not being alone is enough.   

Wandering into the Wilderness

If we are wondering if we have wandered into a spiritual wilderness, there are a few noteworthy signs.  Life is out of sync.  It is as if our steps fall not quite on the spot they are intended to fall.  Unexplainable anxiety hovers at the edge of all the things we do.  Relationships seem frayed and life is lived on edge without any apparent reason.  We live with the dreaded feeling that one more thing piled on to the already overwhelming pile of stuff with which we have to deal is going to push us under.  It is not something we can really talk to anyone else about as we hardly can understand it enough to verbalize our feelings.  We just know deep down in the inner part of our life that something is not right.

 

When life is out of sync, we figure there must be some quick fix.  The first place we are prone to look is at the external things of our life.  The problem is that a quick view of that waterfront often reveals no explanation.  For some reason one of the last places we look is at our spiritual life.  What often puts our life out of sync is the spiritual issue of being connected rightly in our relationship with God.  If it is something upon which we have learned to be dependent and suddenly it is no longer in our life, it is bound to cause an uneasiness that will only be handled by being in the presence of God once more.

 

This sense of being out of sync may be for us a still small voice telling us that we need a quiet and still place to once again synchronize our will with His will for us.  Another term for it is centering.  When the center of our life has shifted it only makes sense that everything which is a part of it seems to be in the wrong place.  It is time for us to "Be still and know that I am God."  (Psalm 46:10)

Waiting in the Wildernes

When the disciples came down from the Mt. of Transfiguration, they entered not a wilderness, but a valley.  To some it might seem that the opposite of a mountain top spiritual experience would be life down in the valley.  And, there is no reason to suggest otherwise.  When the disciples came away from that powerful moment when the sacred broke into the profane, they did go back down to living in the ordinary again.  And while they might have figured they would be forever different, it is likely that the mountain top memories soon faded and became obscure with their ordinary life.  

 

The disciples came down the mountain into the valley.  It was not a wilderness as was the case with Jesus immediately after His baptism.  In other words, the disciples went back to whatever was ordinary for them as a follower of Jesus.  It is as we live in those moments that are ordinary for us a follower of Jesus that we find ourselves struggling to live faithfully in the wilderness.  There is nothing ordinary about the wilderness.  Geographically, it is dry, empty of life, and those who stay there too long are likely to die.  The same can be said about the wilderness of the soul.  Our inner being is dry, empty, and God seems to be an absent deity who has forgotten us. 

Even though our spiritual life is in jeopardy, we are still slow to encounter the reality of the wilderness for it means being so very alone.  Not even God seems to be present.  For those of us who are always surrounded by others, it is a frightening place to walk for no one else is able to help us do the spiritual business required by our longing soul.  We long for God.  God alone.  And He does not always hurry to us, but remains quiet, silent, absent, waiting on us to wait on Him.

 

 

Alone in the Wilderness

When we walk into the wilderness moments of our lives, there is nothing to sustain the soul.   There is no library shelf full of books on the inner life to guide us.  There is no insightful preacher to whom we can listen.  There are no resources.  There is nothing.  We may hurry to these familiar things which have given us strength in the ordinary days, but when the dry and empty wilderness fills every part of our inner being, these things have little value.  We do not want another devotional book, or another Christian song.  We only want the One for whom our soul longs and that is God.

 

The truth is we come to those moments when only God can satisfy.  Our soul hungers longs for what it seemingly does not have.  Our soul thirsts for what seems to be lost in a place that can never be uncovered.  The real hunger and thirst of the soul is not for the things of the past which have sustained us in our walk with God, but God Himself.  Nothing will quench the thirst, or satisfy the hunger except God. 

It is the loss of God, or at least, what seems to be the loss of God which fills our soul as we fearfully tread wilderness ground.  There is something within us that knows it has happened.  It as if our heart has been broken by the Words spoken first to the Garden of Eden couple, "What is this that you have done?"  (Genesis 3:13)   In those moments of our own self created brokenness, we dare to breathe those words of the Psalmist, "As a deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for you, O God."  (Psalm 42:1)   In the spiritual wilderness where the soul is broken, we long for His presence, we weep the bitter tears of confession, and we trust in the grace and mercy of God. 

Into the Wilderness

Many times we walk into a wilderness moment in our life without realizing we are there.  There is no sign on the road of our spiritual journey that says, "Warning.  Wilderness Area."  Life can be a very occupying thing.  We get so occupied with all the things it requires of us that we often find ourselves out there in the middle of a dry and arid and empty spiritual place without even being conscious that we have arrived.  Someone once said, "The Holy Spirit could leave the church and it would not recognize it for years.  It would just go on like it always has without missing a beat."  So, it is with our spiritual living.

 

It is not as if we suddenly decide to do away with our spiritual stuff.  We still attend worship each Sunday.  Our Bibles continue to be read and we pray.  We do the stuff that we have been programmed to do as Christians, but it is not filling us, but only adding to the growing sense of emptiness.  And at first, we are likely to attribute the emptiness to the other things of our life such as the nine to five hours or some relationship issues.  It is only at the point that we come to an awareness that the real issue is a spiritual issue that we begin to see the markings of the wilderness around us. 

 

Even though we are doing all the right stuff, we can still be losing out on our connection to God.  What really causes the dis-connect, the dis-ease in our spirit is not external, but internal.  To find ourselves in a wilderness moment is to realize that we have, perhaps, through carelessness, disconnected ourselves from the God we claim to have as the center of our lives.  It is a frightening place to wake up.  With panic we try to figure out what to do which is, of course, exactly the wrong response.  The wilderness is not the place of practicing spiritual self-reliance, but learning about radical dependency on God. 

Mountains and Wilderness

Most of us would rather talk about mountain top experiences rather than the wilderness experiences of our lives.  The mountain top experiences are those holy moments when the sacred breaks into the secular part of our world in a powerful and life changing way.  They are experiences which make for memorable testimonies.  On the other hand, the experiences associated with the wilderness moments in our lives are usually hard and difficult times when it often seems that the Holy One has forsaken us.  The end result of the wilderness experience is often a powerful life changing moment, but seldom do we associate such moments with being in the wilderness.

 

Of course, both of these extreme experiences do not really have geographic settings, but speak symbolically of our spiritual journey.  The Holy Spirit leads us into some wilderness experiences as is the case with the temptation event known by Jesus after His baptism (Luke 4:1) and some are self-imposed.  The self-imposed ones come to us because of the way we ignore and neglect the practice of cultivating and maintaining a relationship with Christ.  When we are too busy to practice the presence, a spiritual dryness sets into our heart which often feels as if God has deserted us.  The reality is not that He has deserted us, but that we have deserted Him.

But, let it also be affirmed that there are those moments when God might choose to step back in order for us to learn more about what it means to walk in faith.  Do we only trust Him when things are going well?  Is our love for Him somehow given according to how we sense He is blessing us?  Are we being taken to a place such as Mt. Moriah where Abraham was asked to sacrifice everything for God?  Even as God might choose to make His presence powerfully known, He may also choose to be silent so that we might know more completely our own heart.  A wilderness experience does not fit neatly into a box because it is a means by which God brings us to a place He wants us to be. 

Wilderness Musings

I have often wondered about the place of the wilderness in the Biblical story.  Most recently in Genesis I read about Hagar and Ishmael being sent into the wilderness.  In this case there seems to be no spiritual significance, but it was a place which likely secured their survival since Abraham's wife was such a menacing threat.  With others it seems different.  Moses had his wilderness moments.  The whole Hebrew nation had a time in the wilderness as they meandered toward Canaan.  John the Baptist was a man of the wilderness, and, of course, Jesus had a very significant moment in the wilderness after His baptism.

 

In the Biblical stories, there is a literal wilderness.  It is a physical place.  The wilderness in the Word speak of a dry and deserted place where life was difficult and sometimes impossible for those who wandered into it.  It was a place where every minute was about water and food and survival.  It was not a vacation spot, but a place to be avoided.  Yet, time and time again the Words speaks of those who are on the road of faithfulness spending time in the forsaken and empty wilderness which was very much around them.

 

Finding a  physical wilderness in our day takes some doing.  While it can be done, it is not going to be found out the back door.  Most of us would have to go a distance to find something which would qualify as a wilderness area.  Yet, as we read the Scripture we find ourselves drawn toward the experience of the wilderness.   There seems to be some spiritual value to having that kind of moment in our lives.  Even though no geographic one is near for most of us, we still seek to know the experience of it for the way it shaped the spiritual lives of those who have gone on before us.